Friday, January 31, 2014
I took a silly quiz today in the Azure thread that said, among other things, that I viewed my body as a temple and take care of it. And I realize that while I suppose in some part I do view my body as something to take care of, when it comes to food, I'm doing a less than ideal job these days. Oh, calorie wise if anything I'm under eating (bad, I know, but stress is killing my stomach) and I'm remembering to eat fruits and veggies when I can, and trying to get enough protein (probably failing at that, too, but trying).... where I'm failing is that I'm eating far too many processed foods.
I confess I'm really struggling with food, in general. Specifically, I am having a harder time remembering to eat lunch, finding the time/energy to actually do something about it when I remember it, and when I do actually preparing and eating something healthy.
For those of you who don't know me well, I have always had a hard time remembering to eat, especially breakfast and lunch, because the normal cues of when to eat are... unreliable. (I wish this at least translated into weight loss, but sadly, the opposite has been my experience because I'm killing my metabolism). Stress is making this worse, in part because it's making food very unappealing and in part because I have so many other things on my mind that even when I think "hey, it's noon, I should probably eat" the next thing I know it's 2 pm and i'm still working.
Um, like happened today.
It's also making it worse because I just don't have time to spend much time prepping food. Please don't tell me it's just a matter of priorities--my #1 priority right now is graduating, and I'm struggling just to eat, exercise, at least be active on Azure, and you know things like sleep as it is. I know from past experience that if it's not simple and quick to cook, it just won't happen. I'll keep putting it off (easy to do since I'm not hungry and work is always pressing) until my blood sugar has dropped to the point I'm barely functional or I cave and grab what ever is easy. I bet you didn't think a handful of pistachios, some fruit, and potato chips could make a lunch (not what I had today, but I've had lunches like that in the past).
It was easier over the summer and into the fall because I ate a lot of salads--all I had to do was dump the pre-cut/measured ingredients into a bowl, apply dressing of choice, and take to my desk (yes, I know, eating at my desk is bad. Not eating is worse, so I chose to eat at my desk). But with this cold weather, I want hot food... and too often that means canned soups, mozzarella chicken on ramen noodles (very tasty, but not particularly healthy) or something with eggs. Sometimes I make quesedillas with corn tortillas and sauteed mushrooms (not sure that really counts as healthy either, since it's a lot of cheese, but it's tasty and quick).
I am not a particularly good cook, though I can cook basic things if I have a clear recipe (I stink at cooking vegetables, though--which I'm mostly okay with since I prefer most veggies raw anyway). I have no patience for it, for one thing (I do best with things I can walk away from. I even walk away from cooking up eggs and browning chicken). We also have a very small "apartment sized" fridge/freezer, which means space is a major issue... otherwise I'd just batch cook and then eat that all week.
My husband has a ton of food allergies, which also complicate things, though less so for lunch as he doesn't eat it--but we can't have bananas and most fish/seafood (other than canned tuna) in the apartment. Carrots are really, really hard for me to work with, because he's so allergic to them, and tomatoes are almost as hard unless canned ones will work (or I can use them whole, like cherry tomatoes). I can't stand unsweetened yogurt, sour cream, mangoes, and avocados. I also have stressed-out-stomach issues which means I'm pretty much limited to eating easy on the stomach, simple foods--chicken and eggs work well, as do carbohydrates. I have a low spice tolerance on a good day, but right now all spice and acidic foods (like tomato sauces) are pretty much out. I've never mastered the art of cooking rice, I'm afraid (and I can't talk my husband, who cooks our dinners, into buying a rice cooker because our kitchen is small and space is already an issue).
I am not sure what to do but I'm hoping I can figure out something--even a couple of quick, moderately healthy meals. Obviously, I'm okay with dairy, wheat etc. I have herbs. I like most vegetables and a lot of fruit, though I tend to just eat them rather than use them as ingredients in meals. I love soups, but the only soup recipes I really have take hours to cook and can feed an army.... and my husband can't eat them (they can't even be modified to the point he can eat them.) We don't have stock, and no way to store it if I made it (I really, really hate the small fridge. It's the thing I like least about this apartment! Especially the very small freezer). I like eggs but I don't know what to do with them except scramble, poach, fry, or occasionally hard boil them. I do eat left overs when we have them, but lately we just haven't been making things that resulted in left overs.
I feel like I'm being one of those people who is trying to fail (you know the type... the type that always has an objection no matter what you suggest) but I just feel... stuck. I've already thought of most of the obvious suggestions, but still end up eating fried egg sandwiches or canned soup. I'm not a naturally very negative person--I try really hard not to get trapped on the "can'ts" and to focus on the "cans." I'm just having a hard time finding very many "cans" that are quick, easy, warm, AND healthy.