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The emotional economy- building the strength within

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Monday, January 27, 2014

This is the second in series....

The only frame of reference I have is my own experience. However, I do believe I am not the only one who has shared this all too common experience. When I first started my journey (again), I was greatly lacking in the one thing I needed the most to see this through, faith. Faith in the process, faith that my hard work would actually pay lasting dividends, and faith that my efforts wouldn't end up on the scrap heap again. A casual examination of the ledgers of my heart revealed that I was in the red.

My self confidence was bankrupt.

I have had so many emotional withdrawals from my heart by failed attempts to lose weight that anything I tried to do seemed to result in an NSF. It would usually be a year or so before I would scrape up enough gumption to try again.

It's tough when our minds write checks our hearts can't cash.

All of that changed for me when I started setting and reaching small goals. The whole process was one thing leading to another. I made a small commitment to go walking. Once I was able to execute that small promise to myself, I took another step and rode my bike a few times a week. Those were small steps indeed. It's far better to consistently complete small goals such as walking for 15 minutes than it is to over promise and under deliver.

Let me repeat myself...

You are better off to fulfill something small than to over promise and not come through no matter how lofty. Do that often enough and you won't take yourself seriously and faith goes out the window. The belief that change is possible does not come by staring at some model on a "fitspirational" poster. It comes from seeing small commitments through. Each time you do, you make a deposit into your emotional bank account. Do it often enough and you'll catch yourself pondering over bigger goals.

Don't think so?

Go walking enough, then a run/ walk isn't out of the question. Challenge yourself to do a 5k or two, if you're not careful, you might catch yourself believing a 10k is possible. Keep making deposits and suddenly a half marathon isn't so crazy. Each step, each fulfilled promise to train and commit always produces the strength to keep coming back for more.

A full bank account gives you the courage to begin and the will to finish. Big, meaningful goals don't accept rubber checks, the funds have to be there.

Setting and keeping small goals produces the faith necessary to be able to take yourself seriously.

They also give you what's needed to keep going when set backs make big withdrawals. When self doubt comes knocking and accuses you at a moment of weakness. Your consistency gives you the ability to fight back. "Yes I may have dropped the ball but my track record speaks for itself, I WILL get back up and go on".

This is where an all or nothing mentality is your greatest adversary. It tells you since you can't get an hour in at the gym therefore it's not worth my time to show up. Life just has a way of happening and messing up the best intentions. I learned that consistency is more important in the long run than getting in a huge calorie burn because consistency builds habit, strengthens faith, and forges the will to see it through and that makes you strong.

Try it.

See for yourself what making and keeping small goals will do for you....

See if you don't walk a little taller because every day you're proving to your worst critic that you're serious....

The worst critic we have is ourselves. Prove him/her wrong.



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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRAMPIAN 4/17/2014 6:41AM

  You're so right. emoticon

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PINKBUNNY61 4/11/2014 12:00AM

    emoticon

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NASFKAB 3/13/2014 5:20AM

  beautifully put

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JLPEASE 2/26/2014 2:36PM

    This really hit home for me.
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PATTYSPENCER 2/16/2014 8:30AM

    Things I've heard a thousand times but you've said it best. Thank you!

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LOLA_LALA 2/2/2014 11:32AM

    emoticon

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MILPAM3 1/31/2014 3:59PM

  Little steps...long journey. Keep walking. emoticon


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BETRHO48 1/30/2014 11:59PM

    Couldn't have said this any better. Some things I just have to hear and/or read over and over. This is one.

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SUPERDAD55 1/30/2014 11:39PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CLAYARTIST 1/30/2014 11:10PM

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CTHCTH1 1/30/2014 8:26PM

  You illuminated what I am doing this time and I didn't realize what felt different. I have to be "teachable" and taking the small goal pathway has opened my eyes to what is to be learned along the way instead of trying to rush through to the end goal. (The only end goal to this lifestyle change I can see I won't be around to see!) Thanks for doing such a great job.
emoticon Incidentally, I love your writing style!

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BLPRETTYGIRL1 1/30/2014 7:10PM

    emoticon emoticon

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JIBBIE49 1/30/2014 6:55PM

    Great to see your blog featured in the Spark Mail. What an honor. emoticon

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AMBER461 1/30/2014 6:33PM

  Thanks for sharing, very interested blog.

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DELLMEL 1/30/2014 6:13PM

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IAMSODONE 1/30/2014 5:45PM

    emoticon

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RHOOK20047 1/30/2014 2:39PM

    Thanks for sharing your insight. MOst helpful.

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DISNEYDUDE85 1/30/2014 2:30PM

    I needed this today! Thank you so much :) emoticon

Comment edited on: 1/30/2014 2:31:07 PM

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SJKENT1 1/30/2014 1:03PM

    I think everyone is so different. I am not a goal person, but I do like to make plans. Big ones and small ones. Keeping the big ones in mind help me keep on keeping on.

Awesome thoughts Robert!

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GOOSIEMOON 1/30/2014 9:47AM

    emoticon

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CHERYLHURT 1/30/2014 7:26AM

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VAINVT 1/30/2014 7:24AM

  Like you, I had very little faith that I could lose weight when I started a local trial 5 years ago. I was 64 years old and thought you just had to live with extra weight at that age because that's the way all my friends looked. As a result, I set a very low goal, and when I reached it, I was thrilled. Everyone else in the program was discouraged, but my goals were so modest, that I was a cheery 'poster child' for the program. As I stayed with it, I lost more and more weight, and am now at my high school weight. I am still so very grateful.

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ROSEMARDORF 1/30/2014 1:37AM

  I am starting over again. Your blog was meant for me to read! Thank you!!

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FINALLYHEALTHY2 1/30/2014 12:34AM

    Thank you for this! It is just the reminder I needed.

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KACEYSW 1/29/2014 11:42PM

    I so needed this post!

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DGRIFFITH51 1/29/2014 11:41PM

    Instead of focusing on what you can't do, concentrate on what you can do!

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DGRIFFITH51 1/29/2014 10:48PM

    I agree with setting small goals. I started walking around the block, then increased it a little each time I took a walk. Then I set goals to walk one mile and so it goes. I set a goal to walk 500 miles in 2013 and kept increasing it as I met each goal. I walked 903.5 miles in 2013.

Those little victories do add up!!!
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BESYKES 1/29/2014 10:26PM

    emoticon So true!

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CATIATM 1/29/2014 10:24PM

    SO true!

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TRAYANDJAY 1/29/2014 10:22PM

    Oh I love this! I really needed to hear it. I am starting all over again and I've had so much doubt in myself.

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EMMACORY 1/29/2014 9:47PM

    emoticon Thanks for sharing your story. emoticon

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MMARE2013 1/29/2014 8:44PM

    What a lovely blog post! Thank you for your insights, very useful to what I'm going through today!

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DMS1946 1/29/2014 8:29PM

  Great insight!

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NEWTINK 1/29/2014 6:54PM

    So true emoticon

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CLPURNELL 1/29/2014 5:37PM

    emoticon emoticon

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ZOE13O 1/29/2014 5:12PM

    Enjoyed your blog! Thanks so much for sharing
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AJB121299 1/29/2014 4:45PM

    Nice

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YBBHAPPY 1/29/2014 4:21PM

    emoticon

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FITMOMMY1836 1/29/2014 3:40PM

    Very wonderful post. Starting over here too. Believe! emoticon

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WALLPER26 1/29/2014 1:49PM

    You are so right! I just found a report from my Dr's visit sometime in 2012. It had my then weight on it. I realized I've lost just over 15 lbs since then! What a rush!

Slow and steaady wins the race! emoticon

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CERULEANTEAR 1/29/2014 12:51PM

    "Challenge yourself to do a 5k or two, if you're not careful, you might catch yourself believing a 10k is possible."

That's exactly what I'm training for. I feel confident in myself because of my past successes.

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CUDDLYPOLARBEAR 1/29/2014 12:44PM

    well said

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LAVENDERLILY 1/29/2014 12:12PM

    emoticon Thanks for sharing.

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JRRING 1/29/2014 11:50AM

  emoticon

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MRSRIGS1 1/29/2014 11:42AM

    You are so RIGHT!! When I started Spark, I couldn't bring myself to exercise. Partly, because I was in so much physical pain and partly because I was lazy. Every time I went to see my doctor, she would ask me if I began a walking program (I had told her I used to walk 5 miles a day and liked it). I felt embarrassed that each time I told her 'no'. So, eventually I promised that I would walk around the block. I did it. It took me 10 minutes. Then, I would add increments of 5 minutes. Before I knew it I was walking 30 minutes a day. Once I realized that I was feeling better, I promised myself I would become consistent and walk 30 minutes 7 days a week for a whole month. I did it! Now, I walk 7-7.5 miles a day which takes me a little over an hour and half. Who would have thought I could do this? Certainly, NOT me!

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RUNNER4LIFE08 1/29/2014 11:24AM

    I loved your bank account analogy. It really hit home!

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BUTTERFLY-1976 1/29/2014 11:11AM

    emoticon emoticon

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SIZE8NOTSOMUCH 1/29/2014 10:10AM

    Thank you so much for sharing... i REALLY enjoyed reading this. So true, but sometimes I can't follow, but I must learn now.

Thanks again,
J


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LISASGONNADOIT 1/29/2014 9:58AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SPWITHSPIRIT 1/29/2014 9:58AM

    you are right on. thank you for sharing your thoughts and helping to keep all of us motivated. In addition to the small fitness goals, I like the idea of applying that to the scale as well (someone else mentioned just focus on 5 lbs); instead of worrying about the total that we need to lose, just focus on 2 (you know for the 1.5 - 2 lbs per week). One week will then lead into the next...
thank you emoticon

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