Pedicure tomorrow; comparisons
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Yes, something to look forward to. Mom and I will be venturing out in below zero weather to get our toenails painted, then stick them back into boots. We really must like getting fussed over. Hey, I even shaved my legs for this. (I like to think the person giving the pedicure did not, just so I can feel superior. LOL) Seriously, I am kidding. I never want to use someone else to inflate my worth.
I have spent time with people who seemed to base everything on comparison. One woman said directly to me as a way of describing someone I 'should have known'..."Cookie, she is built almost as bad as you are." I have heard people very close to me refer to someone as "Almost 200 pounds, I am sure!" (This was said to me about someone else..........when I weighed 213.) This person sometimes refers to people as "Big fat slob." How unnecessarily hurtful...even if not said within hearing.
Why can't we judge ourselves based on what we were or what we want to become...or not judge at all? I do not want to come home at night and think, "I am glad I wasn't the fattest person there." Nor do I want others to be grateful I was there for the same reason.
Will we ever get to a point where we are described by who we are, not how we look? 'The wonderful nurse' or the 'guy with the great sense of humor'? Sometimes I think people do not even try to remember names, figuring they can always describe the physical features. Am I wrong in thinking that some people do not even attempt to see beyond the surface?
Which person has been deemed unworthy because we have not made an effort to see the inside? And, since the inside does not change as rapidly as the outside, our snap decision is flawed.
Just as an experiment...think of someone you love, preferably for a long time. Now describe them. Open your eyes and see how close you are. My husband of 46 years?? In my mind he is still the Marine I dated, blue eyes blond hair, dimples, twinkle in his eye, nice butt. If I were to describe him the way I see him, it is doubtful others would be able to recognize him. But, the fact of the matter is, I no longer see his outsides at all. I see the husband that he is, the father that he has been. I see the son that visited his Mom 3 times a week for years. I see his heart. The twinkle is there, and yeah, the butt, too. Weight? I truly could not guess, because it does not matter. I would need someone who does not love him to tell me what he looks like.