Sunday, January 19, 2014
Ah! I had such a good night last night. I left work, went straight to my parents' home and together with my brother watched the ENTIRE third season of Sherlock (BBC). It was AWE-SOME!
But...I also fell asleep without blogging, although I did log all of my food and stayed within range.
So here's a little catch-up:
Day 18 - change your definition of full
Oh, how true. The more you eat and the more you gain weight, feeling not only full, but stuffed, becomes completely normal. We even stop feeling hungry. In one of the past tasks, you're supposed to skip lunch to learn what the true sensation of hunger feels like. Well, what I find when I'm not being "good", is:
a) I rarely feel true hunger and if I do, I have a very difficult time coping with it - I get cranky and usually go stuff my face when nobody is around...like when I leave work to go home and haven't eaten and I know I'm going to have dinner, but I'll stop and get a chili dog or 99-cent burger at a drive-thru...despite knowing I'll be eating a meal in 60 minutes.
b) not only does feeling full all day and after a meal feel normal, but I frequently will continue to eat to the point that I am very, very uncomfortable, maybe even can do nothing but lie down. If it's early in the day, it pretty much means that I spend the rest of the day doing nothing.
The key is to break the connection between been overly full and normally full. It takes time to get to this point and it is certainly not something that you can change in a day or two.
Here is what Beck recommends:
1) first off, to ask yourself if you could go for a brisk walk after a meal - if no, you've overeaten. Ok, I get that.
2) remove triggers that cause you to overeat - if you find yourself standing around the food at a party, walk away and decide that you won't eat again for x amount of time, or decide that you're going to be the LAST in line to eat...sit, keep chatting...don't let food be the primary thing on your mind. How many times have you been to a buffet wedding or event and you sit there in agony, trying to make small talk, staring over at the food as the servers get everything ready, waiting to leap as soon as they announce the food can now be served? How many times do you walk briskly to the table, heart racing, stomach churning, SOOOO ready for food? You certainly fill your plate to the max and when you sit down to eat, you're already making a mental note of what you're going to get for seconds. Yup, we've all been there.
3) respond to your sabotaging thoughts - have an internal dialogue and win the argument! Go to the bathroom and stand in the mirror and talk to yourself, if you have to. Above all, remind yourself that that fettucine alfredo or sweet and sour meatballs will not be the last food you ever eat in your entire life. Also remind yourself why you want to lose the weight - read your advantages card! Regardless of who wins the argument, be 100% certain of your decision. So if you don't go for seconds, congratulate yourself and move on. If you decide you do want a second serving (maybe it really is something you don't have often, like your Grandma's apple pie), have it, log it, but then move on. Don't put any guilt on yourself if you were 100% sure of your decision, because that's what leads to binging and stopping to track. Ok, Beck doesn't really tell you to do that, that's just how I feel about it. Beck wants you to make the right decision :)
Day 19 - stop fooling yourself
Beck - dieters have an amazing ability to delude themselves about food. How many times have you given yourself a "fake" excuse to stop your diet or to eat?
- I never get to eat this and I'm only going to have 1 piece
- It's just a small piece
- It'll just get wasted if I don't eat it
- It's a celebration!
- I really want it
- I'm craving it and if I don't eat it now, I'll eat it eventually anyway
- It's just the crumbs, it's the last piece
- It won't make a huge difference
and it goes on and on...
How to stop fooling yourself:
- if you're supposed to be measuring your food, don't fool yourself into thinking that you can truly estimate what you're eating. You need to measure it if that is your plan. In time, when you have been doing it for a while, test yourself. As time passes and you get good at knowing how much you're eating, maybe you can back off of the measuring. Some people can't.
- again, have an internal dialogue (see above).
I've decided to change how I use the Beck diet. There are daily tasks, but I'm finding myself nearly at week 3 without truly feeling like I've instituted all of the tasks. I feel like 24 hours isn't enough time to work on a new habit and already institute a new one the next day. I'm tracking, which is great. I'm blogging and staying active on SP, which is part of my plan to stay accountable. But looking back through the last 18-ish days, I'm not readying my advantages card twice a day (once at best, if at all), I'm not eating slowly and mindfully at every meal, I'm not giving myself daily credit, I'm not doing spontaneous exercise, I'm not doing planned exercise, I'm not writing out food plans for the next day, I'm not sticking to the daily schedule I put together for myself, I am monitoring and not overeating. I feel like I need to press "pause" before continuing onward. There are a few habits I want to make and that I know will be part of a healthy lifestyle, and I haven't given myself enough time to make them a habit. So from now on, not every task will be daily - some will need to be a week-long task. I'll assess daily and decide at what set date I'll move on to the next task.
For now, I want to move back to Days 3, 4 and 5: eat sitting down, eat slowly and mindfully and give yourself credit and will move on to the next group in 1 week. Setting a reminder in my phone right now.