Sunday, January 19, 2014
So grateful I have had the courage to continue my journey after falling down. Getting back up is what life is all about. This time around I am prepping myself for that eventual day that once again I am fit. Why did I go back into the pit? I'm trying to figure that out...so I can be on the lookout when the time comes. But one thing is certain...this time I am blogging my daily journey - the ups, the downs, the highs, the lows, the raw emotion, the fear of failure, the fear of success, well, you get the idea.
I want to pour my heart out here...in a safe place. Where I might be able to help someone else make the decision to get back up again and take care of themselves. To just do it until it becomes second nature. Till you can accept yourself, love yourself, and know that you ARE worthy! I think somewhere deep down inside of me (the place that frightens me most) is where that nasty feeling of not being worthy comes from.
So here we go...I've been eating clean for 11 days now. Eating between 1300 & 1400 calories per day. And I have logged all my food (which I believe I will have to do for the rest of my days on this earth) since. I seem to only have success with self control when being honest on paper (or computer) and logging every morsel that goes into my mouth. Some folks may be able to get so good at this that they can stop recording their food...but I haven't ever reached that point...as I always gain when not logging. And I'm ok with that. At least I know my weakness and how to overcome it.
My exercise and sleep still have to get back in order...on that note, it's way past my bedtime and I will be back tomorrow for more gut spilling.
Stick with me...it's going to be one fun ride!
Eat well, live well, stay well!