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My Turn To Be Strong

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Saturday, January 18, 2014

My streak of being on track ended on Monday. My husband had been feeling ill since early Sunday morning, and he refused to go to the hospital. I was so worried about him and I couldn't even think of working out. To see him in such pain scared me, to be honest. He was literally shaking from the pain, but it wasn't until Wednesday that I was finally able to talk him into letting me take him to the emergency room. I actually had to threaten to call an ambulance first! I just thank God that he finally agreed to go to the hospital, because it turned out that he had a ruptured appendix. When I think of the possibility of losing him, it makes me feel so cold inside.

I remember when I first met him, back in 1996. He was not my type at all! I'd always been attracted to dark haired guys with a "big ole teddy bear" build, if you know what I mean. As a matter of fact, when I met him I was just ending a casual dating relationship with his best friend, who was a big ole teddy bear!

I don't believe in love at first sight, but the first time I saw Dave, I came as close to that as possible. He was kind of short (only five foot seven), with blonde hair, blue eyes, tattoos, and a goatee and mustache. He'd just gotten off from work (framing houses) and will still in his work clothes...faded jeans, work boots and a sweatshirt. We talked and found that we both liked books by Stephen King. At that time, Stephen King had written The Green Mile, and it was being put out in 6 short books as a series. Dave wanted to read them and I told him that he could borrow each of mine as I finished reading them. I loaned him volumes 1 & 2, and told him he could have the 3rd installment when I was finished. A few days later, he came by to see if I was done with volume 3. I was...but I told him I wasn't, just so he'd have to come back another time!

One of the things that made me fall in love with Dave was that he was young (10 years younger than me) and strong. It made me feel safe. But now, he's in the hospital and he's so weak! It hurts me and scares me to see him this way. I know he'll get better, but right now its making me feel so sad. I have to help him walk up and down the halls. He looks so frail to me right now when he's lying in that hospital bed! The pain medication makes him confused. Its almost like he's a different person. I know its going to take a while for him to get back to normal. He's always been there for me so now I'm going to be there for him. I guess its my turn to be the strong one!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • GRAMPIAN
    Hope the recovery's complete now. emoticon
    977 days ago
  • GEORGE815
    Things will get better when his health returns. I hope nothing will change for you then.
    1033 days ago
  • CHEBBA
    I had the identical thing happen to me when I was in my twenties (a long time ago!). I was in the WRAF and the culture of 'manning up and keeping going' worked to my detriment; I have a high pain threshold so I did keep going, I left my illness too long and it ruptured. Fortunately, here in England our brilliant National Health system, for all it's woes and often falsely quoted pitfalls, means I had no reason not to wait... especially in the military,too, but I did because I didn't want to be a nuisance. It was touch and go for a while but I pulled through, with drainage tubes in for ages and scars to remind me forever. At the time of writing I know Dave has pulled through too, but I wanted to say how much I understand your worries while you watched over him. I'm thinking about you both and wishing all that is good.

    I was tickled about the age difference with your husband! My first husband was 4 years younger than me, my DB now is over 7 years younger, and we've been married for 24 years. We're very happy indeed and he is my soulmate, so all you say resonates with me. I never set out to have younger husbands, in fact it was a shock to know my DB was even interested in someone so much older, but we were both officers in the RAF so had a similar general ethos, and in our case it was dogs which brought us together. I had no idea he 'had designs on me' and it was a friend who pointed it out although I pooh-pooh'd the notion, I just didn't see it! But he was determined so here we are. As with you and your precious husband, we share so many things by way of intellect, interests (not all, though, which is good as it allows for independence too), our passion for dogs and animals and, above all, our senses of humour, that nobody even realises there is an age difference! Let's hear it for older gals with younger husbands!!!

    My sincerest best wishes to you both and my fingers crossed for your continuing success in your quest for good health.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon .
    1042 days ago
  • EFFRAYECHILDE
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    1043 days ago
  • MARBEALL
    Thank you for sharing your journey. You are awesome. You are strong. You can do it. Because you already have.
    1047 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/27/2014 7:47:05 AM
  • CVRONEK
    Thank goodness he went in when he did, Pixie. SO glad he has you.

    I also love your love story. emoticon
    1048 days ago
  • CHERIJ16
    Pixie my thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband. emoticon
    1050 days ago
  • GAILSMAILS
    Oh Pixie! Very sorry to read this news on your husband!
    How very sweet to share the story of when you met.
    I will keep you both in my prayers.
    Gail
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    1050 days ago
  • MONTREAL12
    Wishing Dave a speedy recovery and a quick return home. Be strong as the willow; remember to bend with the wind. emoticon
    1050 days ago
  • SUPERDAD55
    That is what love is all about...
    Being there for each other.
    I know that you are his pillar of strength
    and that he will get better soon.
    Just be there for him.
    emoticon emoticon
    1051 days ago
  • IMEMINE1
    I'm glad your hubby is doing better. He'll be fine with you taking care of him. emoticon
    1051 days ago
  • HOTDEENOW
    I love your story! Hope he feels better soon...
    1051 days ago
  • SBFT84
    Wishing a speedy recovery and quick discharge to home.

    1051 days ago
  • MARYJEANSL
    Hope he gets better soon so you can bring him home quickly!
    1051 days ago
  • PNCARLSON
    I hope that recovery is going well. He is fortunate to have you, and you are fortunate to have him. Keep us posted so we know how to pray!

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    1051 days ago
  • PACKERMANN
    that's the beauty of being married...being strong for each other.
    praying for comfort & healing for both of you.
    Pat
    1052 days ago
  • QTEALADY20031
    Dear Pixie, I was away all last week and did not have my computer. Kathy told me about your husband. Thank goodness that you got Dave to go to the emergency room. Pixie, I know you will be there for Dave and God will give you the strength to help him through this. He is going to feel weak for awhile but eventually I am sure he will be his "old self". Its going to be a matter of time but I am sure Dave knows that you will be there for him. Please know that both you and Dave will be in my prayers. emoticon emoticon June
    1052 days ago
  • DEEKELLYE
    I hope Dave feels better soon.
    1052 days ago
  • _BABE_
    I love the story of how you met! Ten years younger...girl! emoticon

    You are a strong person and you will get through this because of it!
    1052 days ago
  • CIROHIO
    I am just catching up on things. Praying for a good recovery for hubby Dave. Pixie you are a strong willed determined person you will make it through this and many more things. Prayers and hugs for you and hubby!
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    1052 days ago
  • WHOVIAN3
    So glad he went to the hospital!! Don't worry about ending your streak,you will get back on when you can...You know you will! Take this time caring for him and your self. I hope he has a speedy recovery!
    1052 days ago
  • BUFFYSMOM2
    Dear Pixie:
    You are so much stronger than you think. You just have to be calm, meditate, and focus. Listen to me, you'd think I had it under control. Your man must really have a high pain threshhold. Woo!!! It's very scary to see someone you love and depend on in pain with the possibility of losing them. We just never know. Now when I get mad at hubby for something trivial (we're 63), I just go off, settle down, and think if he was gone should I really have worried about the incident(s). Also, letting go feels good!!!!
    You're going to be ok. You've come so far. I'm praying for you and hubby. Hang in there, Sparkie!
    Hugs!
    Patti
    PS 10 yrs younger, huh? You must be doing something right!!!!!! emoticon
    1052 days ago
  • MANDELOVICH
    I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. Oy vey! I am hoping he recovers well and that you do too. I know how hard this is! Sending love to you! xo
    1052 days ago
  • FRANCES-AGAPE
    emoticon

    AWWWWWWWWWWWWW

    emoticon
    to hear love stories !

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    Still Praying for you both/all


    LOVE, PEACE and BLESSINGS !


    emoticon emoticon emoticon

    1052 days ago
  • ISABELLE31
    You both continue to be in my thoughts. Do what you need to do to take care of you both, even if that means not keeping your streak. Just do what you can to make good choices while you're going through this. emoticon
    1053 days ago
  • UWPALUM
    Your husband is lucky to have you there to be strong for him when he's not able to be strong himself. You can do this.
    1053 days ago
  • GLASSART43
    Beautiful love story, Pixie; you are a strong person! I've seen my husband through 2 heart attacks and waited to fall apart until after I knew he would recover. Take care of yourself and know we are all sending you love and support.

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    1053 days ago
  • SLIMMERJESSE
    So glad you got him to the ER in time. What a scare! Most men I know will not go to the doc or ER, what's up with that? Stay strong and we are all here for you. Big hug to you both.
    1053 days ago
  • CAREN_BLUEJEANS
    Wishing your DH a full & speedy recovery.

    It's OK you got off your streak 1 day. You can start a new one today.
    1053 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/21/2014 10:08:59 AM
  • CHOPOLA
    That's a beautiful story Pixie, thank you for sharing. Wishing your husband a quick recovery. Thinking of you both.

    -Star
    1053 days ago
  • DEBSZOO74
    Pixie, I enjoyed reading about how you met your husband. I'm so glad that he was released from the hospital and hope he has a speedy recovery. emoticon
    1053 days ago
  • SUSIEMT
    Consider Dave in my prayers. Thank goodness he has you to lean on!
    1053 days ago
  • SPDEWINA
    Be strong Pixie. You can do it for him..
    1053 days ago
  • JERICHO1991
    It's your turn now. Be strong. I know you will.
    1054 days ago
  • LIVINGLOVINLIFE
    pixie I know this is a scary time for you and I am glad your son is there for you. Dave should do fine, he is young, in apparent good health and has an active life. It will probably take a few weeks to get back his full strength but as long as he takes any meds the doctor tells him to and stays active he will do fine. Now you need to take care of yourself so you can help Dave get back on his feet. Men usually aren't the best patients. They don't like being sick, depending on others and they can be pretty fussy. So my prayers go out for Dave to make quick recovery and for you to hang in there it will get better. Hugs Pat emoticon emoticon
    1054 days ago
  • MORTONDH
    Dear Pixie, I have been thinking about you and what you are going through with your husbands health. He will be ok and so will you and your family. You saved his life by making him go to the hospital. He will likely need to be on intervenous antibiotics for a week or so after the surgery and then he will slowly but surely regain his strength. Remember that recover means 2 steps forward and one set back but week by week all will return to normal and you will be closer than ever having gone through another challenging time. My warm thoughts and healing wishes are coming your way from Canada. Make sure to look after yourself so you can be strong and healthy for your family. A walk or 2 in the fresh air to clear your head is sure to help. I have spent much time in hospitals. Soon everyone will be well and this will be in the past.
    xoxoxoxoxooxxoxoxooxxoxooxoxoxo
    xxoxoxooxxooxoxxoxooxoxoxoxoxox
    oxoxoxoxx
    1054 days ago
  • DJSHIP46
    I wish I couldn't relate to this blog but I can. Hope your guy is himself again very soon. My man just turned 78, and he has yet to fully recover from surgery he had a year ago. I'm not sure he will and it is very difficult to see! My best to both of you. emoticon
    1054 days ago
  • TREYONE
    Be strong-know it is scary when someone you love is ill and in pain!!! Prayers going your way for your husbands recovery. emoticon
    1054 days ago
  • NEPTUNE1939
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    1054 days ago
  • CORNERKICK
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    1054 days ago
  • KML410
    Thank God he went to the hospital. You must stay strong for him so don't forget to take care of yourself. It's hard to watch when someone you love is so sick but hopefully every day you will see some improvement. Will keep your dear Dave in my prayers and you too! Keep us posted on his progress. emoticon emoticon
    1054 days ago
  • BLUEJEAN99
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    1054 days ago
  • CICELY360
    Thinking of you.
    1054 days ago
  • WVROSE1
    Wow! How scary that was for both of you. Glad he got to the hospital. Sending hugs and prayers to you and your family. Best wishes to him for a speedy recovery!

    Hugs,
    WVRose/Ru
    thie
    1054 days ago
  • SJKENT1
    Praying for you and for your husband. Stubborn men! My husband did a similar thing with chest pain. He's ok but should have told me instead of holding it in.
    1054 days ago
  • CLAYARTIST
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    1054 days ago
  • MARITIMER3
    You're a strong woman, Pixie. You can do it. I hope Dave will be home soon emoticon .
    Hugs. Gail
    1054 days ago
  • FRECKALYMC
    Sending out big hugs to you. My appendix "perforated", they said, about five and a half years ago. (I had just turned 50.) My husband was out of town at the time and was really upset with me for not going in to the someone sooner. (It couldn't be that at my age, right??) I felt like I'd gotten hit by a Mack truck for awhile there. I thank God for him being there when I finally went in for surgery and for taking such good care of me through it all. You'll both make it through this. He's blessed to have you there, now.


    1054 days ago
  • PENOWOK
    This must have been super scary!!!
    1054 days ago
  • GOOSIEMOON
    My thoughts and best wishes for you and for your husband's full and speedy recovery. Take care of yourself! emoticon
    1054 days ago
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