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Find Your Inner Adult!

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

I have read a couple of blogs and posts today about accepting the realities of life as an adult rather than that of a child. "But I want it!" or "That's not fair!" are the attitudes of children.

We celebrate childhood these days. Everything I needed to know in life I learned in kindergarten? Really? I had to learn self discipline, it wasn't something I was born with, and I sure hadn't learned it by kindergarten.

Maybe I was just lucky to have been raised in a happy, loving home, one where our parents tried to give us everything they hadn't had as children growing up in the depression. But it wasn't until I was well into adulthood that I was able to appreciate that what they had given me was just that: a gift, not an entitlement based on some idea that I deserved more happiness and ease than anyone else.

Children expect others to give them the things they need, which is natural for children. Someone else feeds them, provides shelter and clothing. Someone else reminds them to do their homework and clean up their rooms. We spend our teenage years yearning for the freedom of adulthood, then when we become adults, we wonder why it isn't as free and fabulous as we wanted it to be. Somewhere along the line, we had to become responsible for our own happiness.

We are supposed to "Find our Inner Child", as if only a child can enjoy life. Frankly, I like being an adult. I like the idea that if I am unhappy, I don't have to find someone to fix it. I don't have to control other people (good luck with that!) in order to control myself. Happiness and success are within myself, if only I can channel my Inner Adult.
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  • KANOE10
    That was a good blog. But I want it and it is not fair are constant thoughts that need adult discipline. I enjoy being an adult and taking responsibility for my life. I am teaching children all day and hopefully training them to take responsibility for their actions.
    1391 days ago
    I don't know why but this wonderful post of yours touched my "inner parent" more. But she's supposed to be an adult, too, right?
    Amazingly thought-provoking blog! And I think most of us should grab the opportunity to really and deeply think about how much we have channeled our inner adult and to what extent we have become responsible for our own happiness.

    1391 days ago
    Your posts here on SP have always represented an adult point of view. In fact, I thought of you several days ago while I was listening to the Siebold videos and being told to act like an adult.
    I feel as if I finally am 100% adult now -- even when it comes to food and exercise. (I believe I was always behaving as an adult in other areas of my life, food just took a longer time.)

    You are a good role model here.

    1403 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1404 days ago
    Very well put. I would rather be an adult. Yet there are times when we feel like kids again. emoticon
    1405 days ago
    Well written Nell….It's all about introspection… and I also believe it is situational…..

    Hope your husband is doing well now….

    Best wishes
    1405 days ago
    emoticon Nell, we need to look within ourselves.
    1405 days ago
    Love that headline – realising I really appreciate my inner adult but you know I really need to respect my inner child as well. They need to cooperate if I want to balance my life. Not either-or but both-and.
    1405 days ago
    emoticon I agree wholeheartedly!
    1405 days ago

    The best time of my life is right now! Youth is overrated, in my opinion!
    1405 days ago
    1405 days ago
  • GABY1948
    I agree with this 100% if not 110%! Responsibility and integrity in this world are definitely two BIGGIES (or lack of them) that irritate me no end.

    This is all so well said, Nell, and I wish we could get it out to the world somehow! emoticon
    1406 days ago
    I love being an adult rather than a child. You get to pick who you want to live with and you are responsible for your own choices.
    1406 days ago
    Thanks for this and for your comment on my fatloser blog today on the same topic. You have been extraordinarily successful with your weight maintenance (and other areas in your life) BECAUSE you've accepted the responsibility of being an adult . . . everything you post communicates it loud and clear.
    1406 days ago
    Love it! Very well said.
    1406 days ago
    I am guilty of not appreciating my parents when I was a child, but I did my fair share of holing up in my room with a book or my daydreams (no computer, stereo, or TV), so I became adept at entertaining myself. That skill had served me well all my life, as I am never bored. There's always something I need to do and/or want to do. One thing I would like to change, though, is what Zeedra calls being a "hard-fast adult." I have a very hard time loosening up, going with the flow, and having fun. I love my comfortable routine,and I fear what people will say or think if I just let go.
    1406 days ago
    We've lost the distinction between childish and childlike - perhaps because it's so hard to parse how the two differ. And then it's hard to know what you are supposed to do when 'seeking your inner child.' Is it simply a matter of shedding all maturity or seeking the mature version of your childlike self? Which sounds to me like your inner adult.
    1406 days ago
    I love your blogs! There's no substitute for accepting where we are in life. I put my "inner child" in timeout and moved on!
    1406 days ago
    I, too, was given a wonderful childhood by parents who cared and wanted what was best for me. One of the best things they gave me was a good work ethic. My parents both worked hard and kept busy all day long, and I'm pretty much the same way. But one thing they didn't teach me was portion control! I'm still trying to learn when enough is enough.
    1406 days ago
    i agree it seems that children are happier and freer.alot of that is to do with they don´t have the worries and responsibilities that go with being aan adult,they often have the innocence of trusting people as they don´t know all the complexibilities of human nature and life itself but remember for those who might be jelous of this fact that a child also doesn´t have the control over their lives that we as adults have.alot of our life is often to do with our attitudes but the beauty about adults is we have the ability to do something about our attitudes when we are willing to take the effort or make the effort.we really do have that much one need ever feel powerless if they really put their minds to it and prepared to step out of their comfort zone and try to see things in a differant light and with a positive is not so much what life throws at us but what and how we handle what life throws at is amasing really how much power we actually do or can have over our own lifes when we are prepared to risk it. emoticon emoticon
    1406 days ago
    1406 days ago
    Well said.

    I don't think it's always an either/or...some of us just seem to have a nature that can appear childlike to other adults and that's okay as long as we don't shirk the responsibility of adulthood. And some of us have become hard-fast adults who have lost the ability to loosen up when the opportunity be so stuck in rules and regulations that new ideas can't push their way in.

    Yes. The inner child movement may have run it's course.

    1406 days ago
    Really well said. I'm struggling with that concept today, myself.

    1406 days ago
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