Saturday, January 04, 2014
my spark friends:
i feel like i can be honest with you and you will not judge me and berate me. i was having such positive thinking the past 2 days and even yesterday up until bed i did really well.
i have a rather personal medical problem right now that is too embarrassing to discuss. it is not deadly, just a problem that could have been prevented if i would have been smart 10 yrs ago., now i must suffer a little due to my stupidity. so, as i was going to bed, i could not quit thinking about this. i tossed and turned. i got up and did researched. then i tossed and turned some more. finally, after hubby went to sleep, i am ashamed to say that i snuck downstairs and had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. then i made a brownie mix and ate half the batter, talk about making a problem worse. i woike up with gas. and my problem is still there
i guess this must be a lesson to me. i am not perfect. but i am willing to work through this problem i have with emotional eating. esp now.
i finally slept for 8 hours. my husband is a diabetic. during my research, i came across an article that said my immune system could be down which may be causing my other problem. signs of immune system being down would be diabetes. so, when i got up, i had my husband check my sugar level. i have never had problems with diabetes before. my number was 189 the first time. 169 the second time.. my husband says this is meaning i might have diabetes. luckily, i go to dr on monday.
youza. as if i need another problem. i totally blame myself and my love for bread and peanut butter. maybe this is wake up call i need. i do not want to go on another medicine
so now, it is really serious that i get my triglycerides and sugar under control, absolutley no bread, peanut butter, candy bar splurges or ice cream
thank you all for listening to my rant