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    ~INDYGIRL   101,279
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I Still Am a "Fat Girl"


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Sunday, December 29, 2013

But I don't let that define me anymore. I don't like the word "Fat." It is limiting and stereo-typing. People look at me and see an overweight person, but so they know I used to weigh 460 pounds? No! Even doctors try -at first- to tell me I need to lose weight until I pull out my phone and show them before and after pics, then we get on the same page. It's like I'm suddenly a different person to them.

Just the same, I fight with my inner fat girl on everything every day. She wants to eat all day, every day. An emotion comes up, a food looks good, a commercial comes on, somebody mentions something tasty and she's off. She still bucks me when I want to exercise. So does my body, as I am still disabled and have chronic pain. I'm human.

So I separate out that inner fat girl from the me I want to be and live that life I want to live. Why? Because Spark Life is so much better than my old life. So when you think about why you should do this, why you should fight that inner fat girl or guy, think about how much better your life could really be. Dream BIG! Don't just think numbers on a scale.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRAMPIAN 3/14/2014 7:16AM

  Good advice. emoticon

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DARSHAN130 1/29/2014 5:05PM

    you are a true inspiration

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MOMMA2SKI 1/15/2014 11:04AM

    emoticon

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LIVINGLOVINLIFE 1/13/2014 11:20AM

    Beth I am fighting the fat girl everyday all day .It is a real battle. I am trying to win all the little battles right now and just maybe I will beat her. It will be a long hard battle, she is not used to me fighting. emoticon

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CINDYRENEA 1/12/2014 2:37PM

  you rock/// your blog always helps me

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FITBARB2 1/11/2014 11:19PM

    WOW WOW WOW!!! What an inspiration you are. You have the most beautiful smile!

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NEWFLABULESS 1/10/2014 1:01PM

    Beautiful!!! Thank you so much for sharing!

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GEORGIA_KAY 1/9/2014 9:32PM

    Thank you, Beth. Your words always cut right to the heart of the matter. No wonder as you are nothing but HEART!
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My fat girl rattles her cage every day too. I'm keeping her contained for now--thanks to blogs like this one. You've been there. You know exactly how it feels. Thank you for sharing that with us.

many hugs---Georgia

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CLAYARTIST 1/9/2014 7:38AM

  emoticon

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SCHOPPEK 1/8/2014 7:47AM

    Great job!

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HIPPIEGURL 1/6/2014 1:20PM

    emoticon emoticon

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KATD13 1/6/2014 12:43PM

    Love your blogs!

I often wonder why my own inner fat girl will not shut up.

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1DRWOMAN 1/5/2014 11:49PM

    Nothing better than shutting up doctors!!! Whoop Whoop!

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AHAVAH123 1/5/2014 3:33PM

    Thanks for all your inspiration!! emoticon


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OFGREENGABLES 1/5/2014 5:55AM

    getting caught up on your blog!

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SBARGANZ 1/3/2014 8:02PM

    I think it's funny that docs look at the photos and have that change of heart. :)

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JERICHO1991 1/3/2014 9:59AM

    Fighting the good fight against inner and outer fat.

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KKTODAY 1/2/2014 9:49PM

    Yes!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MSFROGGIE 1/2/2014 9:57AM

    emoticon We all have that struggle, some more than others. Thank you for sharing. . . Keep up the good work!!

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FLAMENM 1/1/2014 9:57PM

    I love the image that the Spark Girl has replaced the Fat Girl.

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MBELL6312 1/1/2014 8:27PM

  I've been following you for 2+ years. "Fat" doesn't count anymore, with how far you've come. You are mobile, active, moving, health, positive, pursuing, keeping going. Hate the label, love where you've come from and are now. Keep it coming, Indy Girl.
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WOOFERCOALBOY 1/1/2014 7:52PM

    You have come -so- far!

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13DOITNOW 1/1/2014 1:04PM

  Thank you for being there.

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WEGENERCS 1/1/2014 12:05PM

    Amen, sister!

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TASTET1 1/1/2014 10:56AM

   
You look great

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HOOSIERNATIVE46 1/1/2014 1:07AM

   
stick to your guns! I recently went to a doctor, who claimed I needed to lose weight, and when was I going to start. Well, I said, "Excuse Me! I have just lost 50 pounds! Rephrase your comment to "great work on your achievement, and continue the good work!" ".
We have to stick together, and we have to take bold measures to correct folks when they try to put us down. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

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PEGGYO 12/31/2013 6:04PM

    emoticon

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ABUELAAMOR 12/31/2013 5:41PM

    Thank you so much for this blog! I am less than half the size I was when I started my strong pursuit of health, but in my head that weight is still there - it is not uncommon for me to mark down my weight at 200+ rather than the less than 150 I weigh. I veer toward the fat section and sometimes feel hopeless about the rest of it.

Your blog has given me a shove and a smile to know that the fat girl I was and the chubby girl I am are just part of the story of me. The whole of the story is much more complex and wonderful.

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HDHAWK 12/31/2013 5:40PM

    Beautiful picture of you! Happy New Year!

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LOTUSBURGER 12/31/2013 5:22PM

    emoticon emoticon

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GYPSAVON 12/31/2013 4:16PM

  Just read this blog post and it really moved me. Looked at your pics and it moved me even more. All I can say is WOW. You've come so far and triumphed. I've been up and down for years and know that even if...no...WHEN I lose the weight that I need to, I will still always be a fat girl too. Decades of feeling powerless and struggling will never go away, but, I'd rather be a fat girl who has persevered and lost the weight than a skinny chick who has never known the struggles at all. It has made me a better person and it sounds like it has done the same for you. emoticon

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TIFALVA 12/31/2013 12:30PM

    emoticon emoticon

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ANDYLIN90 12/31/2013 12:09PM

    I would love to see the doctor's face when he sees where you've been. It's too bad there is such judgment before he/she even knows you.

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EGMINGA 12/31/2013 11:44AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon I understand I fight with myself all the time but I know I have to get rid of this weight for me and my health.

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SLRASSLL 12/31/2013 11:25AM

    Thank you for this. I needed the reminder. I have been stuck in the same 3 lbs range for months 2 down 3 up, 1 down 2 up. I have been frustrated and for 2 weeks I gave in to that inner fat girl. I let her out. Now she's back in her space in the background and I'm slowly getting things right again.
Thank you for reminding my that she is a normal part of me and that she's going to be there all the time. And that we can live the life I want, not the one she wants.
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AMYSYOKO 12/31/2013 11:10AM

  well played, you are one beautiful lady

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ANGELN325 12/31/2013 9:19AM

    Great blog and good for you for showing the doctors how far you've come!

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EBURGITE 12/31/2013 8:22AM

    emoticon

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ROUNDTOWNMOM 12/31/2013 7:42AM

    I love that you keep your before and after photos in your phone.........sometimes you have to show the proof of where you've been.........

You are amazing, Beth................I know someone whom I wish would get on this site and gather some inspiration from you, not only from your weight loss journey, but from your dealing with chronic pain.............................

Thanks for being the wonderful "you" that you are!

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SWEETYOUNGTHING 12/31/2013 6:32AM

    You're always so inspiring and thought provoking. I've reached my goal. When people refer to me as "skinny" or "thin" it ALWAYS takes me by surprise. I suppose, on some level, I'll always see myself as that 'fat kid' who was made fun of and ridiculed all those years in my childhood and early adolescence. It gets easier, though, everyday to recognize the fit me.

Thank you for reminding all of us that everyone we see may be going through a struggle of some kind and we shouldn't judge. We have no idea where that person has come from or what they've been through or, more importantly, what they've achieved.

You're awesome emoticon

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ROX525 12/31/2013 6:27AM

    Thank you! You are a true inspiration!

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FISHER011 12/31/2013 2:14AM

    emoticon Beth for being Inspiring & keeping it real!
Love your blog!
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debbie

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COCOSMOMMA 12/31/2013 1:43AM

    Thanks for sharing! This was very well said!

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BLUEJEAN99 12/31/2013 1:43AM

    emoticon

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SEATTLE58 12/31/2013 12:21AM

    You are one beautiful gal inside and out, Beth! And to dream BIG is so much of your success! Let's keep on a dreamin'! emoticon emoticon

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NONNAOF2 12/31/2013 12:02AM

  You are an amazing human being and so beautiful inside as well as outside!! :-)

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DGRIFFITH51 12/30/2013 11:31PM

    emoticon

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NIKKIJ55 12/30/2013 11:11PM

    emoticon

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ROCKYCPA 12/30/2013 11:10PM

    Thank you for sharing!

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GLORY- 12/30/2013 10:30PM

    I think you are beautiful and awesome just the way you are!!!
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