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ILOVEBIOLOGY
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I Have a Date!!

Friday, December 27, 2013

For the first time since my ex husband left me in September 2008, I have an honest to goodness date. And it's on New Year's Eve. And it's a guy I graduated high school with. We are both from northeastern Ohio and now live in Raleigh. Weird, huh?!! Small world! Both single...although he doesn't have any kids yet.

I didn't talk to him much in high school but always knew who he was. I find it so cool, and kind of strange, that he contacted me through facebook seemingly out of the blue, last month. I moved to Raleigh January 2005, he moved here last June. What's even stranger is he is literally a 10 minute drive from me.

I am excited and nervous about our date. I told him to decide what to do, and if he picks to go out to a bar I'll help him navigate since he's still pretty unfamiliar with downtown (and I worked in downtown Raleigh for years so I know my way around pretty well). I am excited because he seems to be a really good guy, always has seemed that way. But I am nervous because I am about 75 pounds heavier than the last time he saw me, in school. I mean, we graduated in 2001, it's been almost 12 years...but I hate to show up and him having not realized how big I am now... and regret asking me on a date. I am SO insecure!! So for the next few days I'm kind of pushing myself to work out and try to drop a few pounds, at least to feel better about myself. Plus, I notice when I lose weight I tend to lose it in my face first, my belly second. Even just a tiny bit will boost my confidence. I'm too chicken and too smart to do anything risky, though. So if he sees me and doesn't like me, I'll know he isn't a good choice for me. But if I'm lucky he'll like me regardless. Better yet, he'll have realized I'm a bit bigger and still have invited me out on a date (my facebook pictures are slightly deceiving...most of them are only of my face, but there ARE some of me in a dress sitting at a Halloween party looking kind of chunky)....one can hope.

I hate feeling so insecure. I just want to lose this weight, not just to look good, but to feel good about myself. That is way more important to me. I don't mind having scars from having big babies, but this belly fat is such a drain on my self esteem. My legs and back are SO strong and muscular...why can't my belly just sort of go away on its own? :P

I am down 9 pounds from last month though, so that's good. Here's to 3-4 more by Tuesday night. O_O
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • v ILOVEBIOLOGY
    Thank you, Linda_S! We actually just hung out at his house because for some reason I was really cold that night but we got to know each other. I'm looking forward to meeting with him again, hopefully soon. Depends on our schedules, of course. :o) He's a super sweet guy!!!
    932 days ago
  • v -LINDA_S
    Good luck! I'm sure you'll be fine! I can relate to your insecurities, though. Don't stress about losing a few pounds quickly. You are on the right path. First Night can be fun in Raleigh, if he hasn't come up with another plan...

    emoticon
    935 days ago
  • v ILOVEBIOLOGY
    Thank you Seawillow and Needtobeslim3 ! I get more excited each day! It's so funny how such a seemingly small thing to others is such a huge deal for me! :o)
    939 days ago
  • v NEEDTOBESLIM3
    Good luck!! I bet you will have a blast. Happy New year for next week!!
    939 days ago
  • v SEAWILLOW
    Think positive. Don't worry about the what ifs just have a great time.
    939 days ago
  • v ILOVEBIOLOGY
    Kneemaker I think that's the part I'm most looking forward to! Connecting with a man again after 5 years. I'm scared! Haha. Thank you for the confidence!

    Chibikarate Thank you! I need to relax and be myself, you're right!

    Fenwaygirl18 Good points!! I thought he was cute in school too, but was already engaged at that point to my future husband and I wasn't interested in shying away. Thank you for the compliment. I do clean up pretty well, lol.
    I never really gave it much thought that he might be as insecure as I am! I mean, he's in great shape (yummy lol) but maybe he has thoughts like mine, about something. I can only hope both of our insecurities don't amount to much to each other.
    Can't wait for a REAL kiss LOLOL!!
    I will add you also! I definitely will report back, lol. I'm getting a bit more excited the closer it comes.
    939 days ago
  • v FENWAYGIRL18
    Remember he contacted you don't be nervous he probably liked you back in high school and didn't know how to approach you. Men like a little meat on the bones, don't worry what he thinks you need to just show that your a confident young lady men love a woman who is confident, I saw your picture and your a very nice looking woman.
    If you both decide it's not a love match at least you got out of the house for an evening, don't put to much pressure on yourself. You know there's a chance you might not like him and he's probably home thinking that right now hahaha
    Just be yourself and I'm sure you'll be fine, sometimes things happen for a reason him calling you out of the blue might be one of the best things that ever happens , you'll find out on New Year's Eve hahaha your pretty much guaranteed a kiss hahaha HAVE FUN AND ENJOY YOURSELF!!!!!! I'd like to add you and hear how your date went, good luck!
    939 days ago
  • v CHIBIKARATE
    Enjoy your date be happy and enjoy your self and just be happy good date hugz
    939 days ago
  • v KNEEMAKER
    Smile real big and glue your eyes to his. All else will not matter. Good luck as you will do very well.
    939 days ago
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