HELLLLOOO!!! I must apologize for my Spark Sabbatical. There were many reasons for it:
1.) Got married, got happy, got lazy
2.) Gym dates with the hubby became newlywed cuddle sessions on the couch
3.) Work has gotten busier on both jobs
4.) I was too ashamed
5.) I began a different journey: becoming one with my natural hair without weaves.
Let's begin with #1. MARRIED LIFE IS AWESOME. . . .when you marry the right person. I have been married before and it SUCKED. I like to refer to it as my Brittney Spears marriage; it was over before it started. Being married to Derrell is the best decision I have ever made. We got our wedding video back recently and we sat and watched it. It made me cry all over again just hearing our vowes. I am super excited for our future together.
2. As you can see in the above posted picture, gym dates became snuggle dates. I personally have not been to the gym almost at all since our wedding, with a few exceptions. When I am on the road for work, I workout like clockwork; there is nothing else to do! Also, I joined a bootcamp program so I go to these private classes 4-5 days a week and do one hour of high-intensity workouts. I also take the steps everywhere! Last month my hotel room was on the 9th floor. For four days I took the stairs to and from my room everytime. Man, that was a workout!
3. OMG work is crazy! My partner retired and the higher-ups will not replace him. I have had projects galore and when you add that on to having my part-time serving job, I am constantly on the go. Thankfully, I have decided after nearly 11 years serving tables, my last day will be April 14th.
4. I have been too ashamed to admit that I have gained 10 pounds from my all-time lowest weight. Hold up, I JUST ADMITTED IT!!! I did not want to be one of those chicks that are Sparking it out until their wedding and disappear just to reappear 40 lbs heavier. The weight has all went to my gut. It is disgusting looking. But I am not discouraged. I have my whole life to deal with this beast and once I tame the beast, I have to keep it chained down. I am comfortable right now, but I enjoyed myself more 10 lbs ago. I am focusing on getting back THERE rather than somewhere else.
5. Some of you may understand this, most may not. I have been transitioning my previously relaxed hair (chemically straightened) to my natural hair over the past 15 months. I had been paying hundreds and hundreds of dollars (ultimately over a thousand) to wear weaves (extensions) to make me feel pretty and to make me feel accepted as I grew the chemicals out of my hair. One day, I decided I was just going to go for it. I cut the weave out and the next day I stepped out a new woman:
No one at my corporate job said anything. NOTHING. I was shocked and slightly offended. After wearing all of these long weaves for nearly two years, it is obvious I have changed. I took it as a silent disapproval. I did have some girls that had already been natural come and find me to give me encouragement and tell me how good it looked. That helped. That same night I had to wait tables and I had no clue the response I would get. I work in an upper-middle class part of town where the majority of my customers do not look like me. Well whatever response I did not get at my day job, they more than made up for at my evening job. As soon as I walked in my co-workers were saying things like, "Wow!" "I love it!" "You look so young, cute and fresh!" "I WANT THAT HAIR!!" One girl told me that if she didn't know me, she would think I was the most confident, fun-loving girl ever and she would want to know more. I was blown away. AND THE CUSTOMERS!!! In ten years I have NEVER made that type of money. One or two commented, telling me they loved my fro. But the big surprise was in the tips. One guy tipped me $53 on a $47 bill!! In 4 hours I made $168 in tips and it wasn't a crazy busy night. It was like they were unknowingly telling me that I can make this transition and everything will be okay. After that night I began experimenting a little. Here is my "Rihanna" Style.
Well I have some catching up to do. Thank you to all of you who stopped to check in on me. I pray your SPark Journeys are going well. I don't know how often I will be around, but I will definitely be here.