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    LOFLLAMA   45,515
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Really???

Thursday, December 05, 2013

I think I'll take December off from being sober. After all there will be booze at every holiday event I go to! You cannot expect me to upset my friends & the hosts of these parties, can you?

I DON'T DRINK. That's what I say. I DON'T EAT THAT. That's what I say. I DON'T SMOKE. That's what I say.

Nobody presses drugs on me. EXCEPT ALCOHOL!!! Do I HAVE to drink???

I get that people don't like confrontation. Would you let somebody force a cigarette on your 10 y/o??? How about a drink on your 6 y/o??? Will you just sit back & say nothing because you don't like confrontation?

The kids at Lenny's work were joking about 'spiking' our drinks at the company Christmas party because they know we are alcoholics. By the time I got done talking to them they fully understand what a terrible 'joke' that would be. Besides the fact that I can smell alcohol...even in my shampoo...from a mile away. Lenny jokes with them. He says he's allergic to alcohol. Every time he drinks he breaks out in policemen.

Now, I have all the drinkers approaching me for my free drink tickets.

I cannot afford to not be confrontational! ARE YOU KIDDING ME???

When somebody offers me a drink I will say, 'No, Thank You'. That's all. It's actually pretty easy. I used to have this whole conversation played out in my head of how I was going to explain to people why I don't drink. I'm allergic to alcohol. I have to get up early. I have to go home to kids. I'M AN ALCOHOLIC!

I don't owe anyone an explanation on why I don't drink. Or why I don't eat certain foods. Or don't smoke. Or don't do drugs. I am not obligated to drink just because somebody offers me a drink. I'm not obligated to give them a reason either. If they do ask, I am always honest. I'm not ashamed of being an alcoholic.

You don't have to take December off of your healthy new lifestyle either!!! If somebody offers you something you know you shouldn't eat, say, 'No, Thank You.'. If your hostess doesn't respect that than maybe you should reconsider who you are spending time with!! EVEN FAMILY! Nobody in my family offers me alcohol!!! If they did, they would accept no for an answer or I WOULD LEAVE!

I only have to answer to me, but others have a stake in how I behave. What happens to my family if I get drunk? What happens to my family if I die from obesity? Can I tell Mikhail that I HAD to drink because I didn't want to offend my host??? How long before he turns that back on me, do you suppose? When he's 13? 16? 18? I tell him to stand up for himself, but I don't??? What kind of parenting is that???

THE 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS (As promised!)

On the first day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
A Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the second day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the third day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree


On the fourth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the fifth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the sixth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
6 Cheeseburgers
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the seventh day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
7 Schizophrenics
6 Cheeseburgers
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the eighth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
8 Medications
7 Schizophrenics
6 Cheeseburgers
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the ninth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
9 Strippers Dancing
8 Medications
7 Schizophrenics
6 Cheeseburgers
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the tenth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
10 Bobs A Bobbing
9 Strippers Dancing
8 Medications
7 Schizophrenics
6 Cheeseburgers
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the eleventh day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
11 Fists A Flying
10 Bobs A Bobbing
9 Strippers Dancing
8 Medications
7 Schizophrenics
6 Cheeseburgers
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree

On the twelfth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
12 Damaged Children
11 Fists A Flying
10 Bobs A Bobbing
9 Strippers Dancing
8 Medications
7 Schizophrenics
6 Cheeseburgers
5 Golden Boys
4 Butter Balls
3 French Fries
2 Alcoholics
and a Bipolar in a Nut Tree


HAPPY HOLLERDAYS!!!! emoticon
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RAEHIPPYCHICK 12/15/2013 7:33AM

    Well done you for staying sober, and even more well done for explaining to those kids and getting them to understand how unfunny and potentially devastating their actions would have been

I have never understood people who press drinks on others - my ex (alcoholic) partner did this ALL the time and I hated it. As you say we don't try force people to smoke anymore, although when I started there was definitely peer pressure around then (not an excuse, I'd have done it anyway I think!)

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CHERYLE51 12/6/2013 10:33PM

    Sorry, Lisa, but right now I could use a drink. My head has been aching off and on all day. We are supposed to get 10" of snow and I have one son who is still at work and may not get home until midnight.
Another line you could use if worse comes to worse is I can't drink I'm taking medication. I can't drink very much, maybe two drinks as the meds I am on and my stomach don't agree with it.
Glad your holidays were good. So were ours.

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TURTLELADY56 12/6/2013 2:25PM

  you made your plan now your working you plan .....smart lady!!!

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EILEEN828 12/6/2013 2:35AM

    To drink or not to drink- that is the holiday question. For a person in dependency mode it seems like all forthcoming incidences are a personal marathon test of will. But they are not all coming at you in that way. People do want to be the 'host with the most'. So my advice would be to get thee with a festive looking virgin drink as soon as possible to cool down the fury of well meaners. When I abstain from drinking, one of my best tactics to curb cravings is to stay hydrated. Sparkling water with a lemon or lime should do nicely. Bring your own or you might get stuck with soda. Yes you can say no to drinking but in a crowd the less who know the less you have to deal with. This is only a suggestion so do what works for you. Any how enjoy the upcoming holidays. emoticon emoticon

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PROVERBS31JULIA 12/6/2013 12:34AM

    So can you keep the Drink TIckets quietly to yourself, order some soda water with lemon twist or a Shirley Temple or claim "I'm the designated driver!" (you DO have to get yourself home, right?)... and when you get home, take the Drink Tickets out and somehow mark them "WOO HOO" like other Sparkers do with their WOOHOO jars?? Too bad SparkPeople doesn't have a Rubber Stamp with the SP Logo and "WooHoo" or a set of peel and stick stickers with that?? ya know? Or a big poster board with Woo Hoo on it and whatever other positive inspirational atta-girl stuff you want to write and then just glue those unused drink tickets that are now marked WooHoo so no one else could use them either?? (It's not like you need to enable all the drunken sots that come after your drink tickets...).

These are just a few thoughts that popped in my mind, but there's no obligation to use them....

I'm so glad I don't go to these types of parties. I don't believe they Glorify the Christ that they have named this festival after. Sounds more like Bacchanalia !! Years ago I went to a party and I guess I got drunk, I'd never had that happen before but I definitely had a "disconnect" between mind and emotion and body... I'd never really had mixed drinks before, only wine, and I don't think I had eaten enough before I went there (had expected more food to be available but this was pretty much booze and snack food)...I was already depressed because of my recent separation and upcoming divorce process. At some point, I just felt unwanted and unloved, and I drove my sorry butt home. That was scary!! I pulled over when I realized I wasn't together enough to drive but this was in the days Before Cellphones. So I decided I would not drive on any major road, had to think which of the lesser frequented roads to get to my house, so as to avoid the police, essentially. I still was thinking I had a reaction to something else and was depressed because of feeling alone, as it still had not occurred to me it was actually the booze. I bet I would have been drunk enough to get a ticket, but thankfully I made it home in one piece, didn't take down anyone else, no tickets, didn't see any cops, really didn't see anybody else, or am not really remembering much of it now (some 25 years later.). And I never had that kind of reaction again (but I've pretty much only had wine, never any mixed drinks, other than some mojitos at a restaurant where I had more food than drink (and it was likely overpriced and over diluted!). I don't know what it was I had there. Something that the guys mixed up. This kid was a year or two younger than me, and my family had shared a house with his family, moving into their basement after my grandparents home caught fire. Long story.

ooops this is a post comment, not my blog!! Sorry, it's probably longer than your original blog.

well anyway you can see I'm still mixed up, but yea, that scared me and I basically don't do booze. Food is slower but it gets me there...

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COCK-ROBIN 12/5/2013 11:20PM

    You are very strong! And I'm proud of your resolve to resist the force feeders and force drinkers.

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TOKIEMOON 12/5/2013 10:21PM

    I am so sick of having to sound like an ingrate because I choose not to eat some "simply divine" food, or such. I haven't been in a situation where I need to decline alcohol yet. I've been sober for 16 months and haven't put myself in that situation. My holiday plans do not involve the out of town drinkers in my family. The friends I hang with now are in AA.

Your poem is a quite good. I laughed out loud at the "11 fists a flying"! Get enough alcohol flowing, and you're apt to see such a display at family functions. Especially if my cousins' families are involved.

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HDHAWK 12/5/2013 9:43PM

    The last time I lost a lot of weight I found myself explaining why I wasn't drinking when we went out. I knew it would slow down my weight loss. People also feel free to comment on what you should eat. The only time I can easily get people to back off is when I say that my cardiologist wants me to lose weight for my health. Why do we have to have a health issue to get people to back off. If someone tells me "no thank you" I can't imagine pushing the issue.

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KAREN608 12/5/2013 8:47PM

    People do like to try to derail others. Or bring them down to their level?

Liked the poem.

I usually rewrite that song with things like odd socks, stinking kittens, dogs rolled in doo doo... ew!

I remember declining drinks saying I was on medication and could not have any. It sounded so officially important. Or something. Now we don't even go places that have alcohol.

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AWESOMECHELZ 12/5/2013 8:38PM

    Did you write the poem? Pretty creative! And I don't explain why I don't want alcohol or cigarettes or drugs or unwanted sex, etc., etc., etc. Like you, I just say no - no explanation necessary. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
LOVE, CHELSEA

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MARILYNROBERT 12/5/2013 8:26PM

    No one has ever pressed drink on me and it wouldn't matter if they did because I dislike alcohol as much as I dislike eating raw fish...can't make me eat/drink either one of those. emoticon

But people are always trying to push food on me and the nice thing is that I've gotten just as hard headed about not letting them do that as they are about doing it. I'm learning to not let such times trigger me to eat too much later in private, as I have done in the past.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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GENRE009 12/5/2013 8:19PM

    Thanks for sharing! That song was cute! I don't drink either, and I don't care how uncomfortable people get with that. Or that I don't smoke the funny stuff any longer either. I don't need to go thru life changing reality to enjoy or cope with it. And i'm not a baby, and don't need to eat everything on my plate! I have medical problems & this food messes me up for three weeks. I just read the funniest blog, THE PERSON HAS ms, and doesn't like to eat with her relatives because they never make healthy foods, and are very negative & mean. So, she said wouldn't it be nice if we gave people what they really deserved instead of things they can't use. I told her that I would buy a mussel for my sister that is very mean & critics everyone. ha, ha. eva
Not really the sprit of the holidays I know, or of forgiveness.

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WOWEETOO 12/5/2013 8:03PM

    LOVE THAT SONGWRITING FOR SURE MY FRIEND!!!
the lady mary posseing through your blogs tonight!!
emoticon

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KATCHATTEAM 12/5/2013 7:06PM

    emoticon
i just out 12 days of x-mas on my support group & face book
how funny

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SANDRALEET 12/5/2013 6:50PM

    We have a right to say no emoticon to them if they do not like it

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GARDNSONGSTRESS 12/5/2013 6:41PM

    I'm so glad I'm not the only one who can smell alcohol in shampoo. My daughter and I had several conversations about the fact that I could smell whiskey on her when I was taking her to school, turned out to be her hair.

Your song made me laugh out loud.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HLTHAPPINESS4C 12/5/2013 6:36PM

    emoticon emoticon I really don't understand why people feel the need to push drinks on people; it's not like we can't spend the holidays without them. Drinks are not the air we breathe. LOL. Proud of you for standing your ground and absolutely you do NOT owe anyone any explanation.

Loving the 12 Days of Christmas!! emoticon

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TODDERICKV 12/5/2013 6:27PM

    Just do what you want to do. You know yourself best and what you can handle and not handle.

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BETMAWAL 12/5/2013 6:06PM

  Hi Lofllama

No you don't have to explain anything. I've had people "force" food on me, and because I'm non-confrontational I would give in after a few minutes. Not anymore, I say No and that's that.

For me overindulgence means heartburn. How is that celebrating?!!

All the best,

Bet

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UMBILICAL 12/5/2013 6:05PM

  Alcohol can be a friend.

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