20,000-24,999 SparkPoints 23,079

I still have fat days

Wednesday, December 04, 2013

I honestly thought that once I had lost 20kg the fat days would be over. I'd never hate my body again. But, I'm a woman and we tend to be very hard on ourselves. I'm especially hard on myself, always striving for something that would take photoshop to achieve.

I shouldn't feel fat. This is a photo of me 6 weeks ago

I'm a size 10 (US 6) with a normal BMI. Top end of normal but I lift heavy and have a lot of muscle. My fiance tells me that I'm perfect, my friends tell me to stop worrying. Despite all of that reassurance I'm still not happy with my body and I still have days where I feel fat.

There was an incident that I didn't blog about. It was around 2 weeks ago, at the supermarket. A woman whispered (loudly) to her partner something about my legs and how they looked in the shorts that I was wearing. Looking straight at me, I was the only person in the aisle. I went and got a block of chocolate (because I'm human and I eat some junk food) and the woman commented about how I looked guilty and I knew I shouldn't be eating chocolate.

Now the above sounds unbelievable, right? Who would actually say that about someone when they can hear? Her, apparently. I've been really down on myself ever since then, especially about my thighs. I have been trying to think positive things, like

- I was wearing size 10 (US size 6) shorts. How can anyone who wears that size have fat thighs?
- I can squat and deadlift my own body weight, so I have some serious muscle going on in my thighs. I still have fat on my legs because that is where I carry it.
- She wasn't exactly a picture of slimness and health (OK that isn't positive, but she started it!)

So, that is where I'm at. 20kg down. In maintenance for nearly a year with a 1-2kg gain. Still feel fat some days.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hey! There will always be people that tries to make remarks about others because their life is so miserable and they prefer to talk about others than to look in the mirror and see their own ugliness! Eleanor Roosevelt said: Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.
    She seems to be in the last third!

    I totally get what you feel, I lift heavy weights and have muscular legs, sometimes people say things like: Look at her legs, they are so big! and Im like: Oh yeah! And in a couple of years they will still look this great while yours (pardon) will start to melt like cheese!

    Remember how far you have come! Your are great!
    1564 days ago
    She sounds like a woman who isn't happy with her self and took it out on you. Don't get down on yourself for her being a total jerk. emoticon You look emoticon
    1566 days ago
    You look fantastic!
    1566 days ago
    You look GREAT!
    We all. Have days when we feel fat. I AMA size 4(us) and still have fat days.
    1566 days ago
    She sounds like a nutjob! Ignore that wench, you look fantastic!!!
    1566 days ago
    Forget that rude woman. She was projecting on you. You look great! emoticon
    1567 days ago
    Oh Bubble, BIG HUGS!!! You are a beautiful woman who has so much going for her. Look at how far you've come. I remember how you used to make excuses about not working out and more excuses about what you ate. Your totally attitude towards healthy living and working out has changed and I am so proud of you. You should look in the mirror and smile, you are a beautiful woman!!
    1567 days ago
  • KMW987
    You look beautiful! Don't let that nasty woman get to you. She is prob just jealous and projecting her self hate onto you (which you do not deserve!). Congrats on all your hard work & don't listen to the haters!

    "Rudeness is the weak person's imitation of strength"

    1567 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

More Blogs by BUBBLEJ1