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    MIPCY1   27,521
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Wednesday, December 04, 2013

I'm struggling with this whole weight loss thing. I'm back up above my starting weight for the BLC and I ate what should have been 2 meals for dinner last night. We should be closing on our house in 6 weeks, so I'm kind of in a holding pattern until then. I struggle with food because DH sits down with the candy bowl or the bag of chips, or whatever comes to hand and plows through it. Sometimes, I feel like I should eat it all because it won't be here tomorrow. He also gets frustrated when I don't sit still while he watches TV all evening (from the time we get home from work until bedtime). He tells me he wants to work out with me and lose the weight, mostly because I said I wanted to be at my goal weight before we start trying for babies, but he won't work out and he chows down on everything. He doesn't see my weight as an issue. I'm over 50 pounds above my goal (and that's above "healthy" BMI)! His solution this morning, when I told him my bras don't fit very well anymore and I couldn't get them at Dillards anymore, so they're going to be specialty ones, was "Let's go bra shopping tonight!" when we really don't have the money for multiple $100 bras. I feel like I'm whining about all of this, but it gets really frustrating. I WANT to lose weight, but it feels like the more I try, the higher my weight goes. I was really successful in Auburn. I lost 20 pounds and kept it off most of the summer. I gained it all back when I started stressing about my class that would determine if I got my degree or not.

I think I'm just burned out at this point. I've been trying to do so many things and keep so many people happy that I can't take care of myself. I'm trying, but every time he gets frustrated and wants me to sit down, I do. For hours. I keep eating because if I don't, there won't be any left. We desperately need more space, and we both desperately need to lose weight and get fit, especially if we want kids. This weight problem is out of hand.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEWCHINELO 12/5/2013 3:15PM

    You need to talk seriously to your hubby on the need for both of you to lead a healthy life and support each other . . .

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ELSAT137 12/5/2013 10:42AM

    Rebecca - I am right there with you on a lot of those things. I am on a weight gain cycle and it is not pretty. My DH is not supportive of how I eat and trying to help my kids eat better too. It is a struggle. Anything I can do to help you? I have been eating in excess since Thanksgiving and I am up 9 lbs! It makes me so mad but I still keep stuffing myself. Like Pinkyysuee said- we need to just take those small steps forward! We can do it!!

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MNABOY 12/4/2013 9:38PM

    As a husband who needed to lose weight with a wife that needed to lose weight but did not want to, tell your husband you need his help in this weight loss trek. Tell him what you need him to do as well as what you would like for him to do. If he doesn't want to help you know you are on your own and just decide if you want to get healthier or stay where you are. Then do it with SP

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SIOBHANKNITS 12/4/2013 4:00PM

    I wish I had words of wisdom for you. It sounds like the evenings are the hard part right now. I'm not familiar with your living situation, so I don't know if there's another part of your living space you could retreat to or if it would be safe to go for a walk by yourself after dinner. Could you go to the gym after dinner?

It sounds like your husband also has issues of his own or he wouldn't have this behavior pattern. Even under the best of circumstances, having a house built & moving are extremely stressful, so there's no guessing about that part. Maybe talking to a neutral third party (counselor, clergy, e.g.) about your frustrations would help you find some solutions?

I totally agree with your wanting to be at the best health for conception. It's good for you & the baby both.

Hang in there, Rebecca! This too shall pass.
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PINKYYSUEE 12/4/2013 2:39PM

    I am sorry your struggling so hard...one thing, if you don't mind some advice..is something I found...baby steps...if you do too much at a time, then you get overwhelmed...so is there one thing you want to work on...like, drinking 8-8oz glasses of water a day, tracking your food, or staying in range, or just getting up and moving? Or is there something else? Choose one thing and work on that...then go to the next thing...that might help...

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