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    HIMELISSA2007   58,564
50,000-59,999 SparkPoints

underlying fear

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

I realize now I'm actually afraid to get thin. I am losing weight and im terrified. First of all, i may actually be successful and begin a new life. Change is not easy for me. I dont like new things sometimes even if they are positive. All those failed attempts were easy. Staying in the same rut, easy.
Maybe, ill actually have a productive and healthy life. Would that mean more guys would like me? Would i have a better social life? Would i succeed at all those things that i thought were out of reach and virtually impossible? The weight loss is scary. I will be a new person literally half of what i weigh is the weight of a person. Will losing half of me change me? Hopefully for the better.

Then i think i have to do this. Just a little at a time

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
MONICASHAFFER40 11/28/2013 9:48PM

    You owe it to yourself to do what's good for you! You deserve it and yes, your life will change for the better. You WILL change, but you can and will adapt to that change as you go. It's a step at a time...and in the end you will look back and realize that the journey was well worth it...and so are you! emoticon

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MIRAGE727 11/28/2013 3:10PM

    Look to your daughter for inspiration, motivation, and blowing off the fear! That's what I do with my Granddaughter...and it has worked even during my 2 1/2 years of maintaining! Stay strong!

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PRINCESS_SOFI 11/27/2013 3:55PM

    It seems scary but it's really not. Once you get there it's actually quite fun. emoticon

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MRS_LAY0907 11/27/2013 2:08PM

  When I think of change I think of a catapeller (sp) changing into a butterfly... it may take a while but the results are amazing :)

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