Monday, November 25, 2013
She was 16 years old and left at 12:35 pm CST.
She had been having problems the last few days something to do with her stomach. I knew in my heart this would be our last day together in the physical world. I held her most of the day, talked to her, telling her sorry, that it was okay to go and cried!
Sorry that I didn't have the money to get her better, to see what was wrong, to even make her last hours pain-free!!
When she passed, I went and got the shovel and dug her resting spot, near to Skippy's (dog), Heart's (cat) ashes and Kali who we lost because of a house fire in 2011.
I still have 2 cats Tucker (5 yro) who tolerates Trixie (1 yro). Tucker didn't like Mary Jane. I almost lost Trixie last month to Bobcat Fever.
So here I sit with tears still flowing, going to miss her hitting the door to be let in and sitting on the end table next to the door to be let out and her looking at me hoping that I have some soft cat food for her to eat.
I am want to eat bad foods I shouldn't, go over my calories for today, just stuff my face.
I really also want to go take a nap but alas I had to pick up my 14 yro son with special needs (The counselor called me) and break the news that Mary Jane is gone. He'll have bouts of sadness triggered by anything related to cats. It doesn't matter whether it has been 9 years or today.
I feel a little better now, tears still flowing but it's time to ask my son what he wants for dinner. I will prepare what I put on my food tracker for lunch because I ate what I tracker for dinner for lunch because of comforting Mary Jane.