Itīs two in the morning...
Friday, November 22, 2013
...and I woke up and could not go back to sleep. Having a big mug with tea with milk and sugar, two gingerbread cookies and they play popmusic with associations to the 60ties on the radio, makes me nostalgic.
Friend of mine had an awful experience and wrote about it on a mailing list we both have belonged to for many years (in fact that is how I got to know her) I wrote supporting words but later thought that I maybe should have called her. Thing was that she wrote the first mail thursday evening, when I read it - this afternoon everybody had already commented and situation had moved on so I felt as it was a little too late to step in.
But it obviously gave me a nightmare, had a dream about the friend I boarded with before I moved in here, we have hardly any contact nowadays, my "excuse" is that she met a man and has been in love and moving together and fully occupied... and I also feel a little uncomfortable beacuse I feel weak and passive and powerless when I compare my life to hers... which I should not do but still, that is the excuse for not keeping in contact.
And I suddely realise that she probably thinks that I donīt like her, overall I am very bad in keeping up with old friends just for keeping up.
Typical thougts two oīclock in the morning, better go to bed... put the lists back in th ehall last evening, only remaining job is wallpapering the kitchen...