Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Disclaimer - sorry if this blog sounds angry and frustrated, but right now I am both of those things!!
I have been doing a 90-day challenge for almost two months - Sunday will be two months. I get up and meet the group at 4;45am Tuesday- Friday and we meet at 7:00am on Saturdays and Sundays. Our rest day is Mondays. It is a strength training program through Beach Body called BEAST. I also do 3 days of cardio per week.
At the 30 day weigh-in I lost 2 lbs and my measurements were going in the direction I wanted. By no means was I pleased with the results, but it was something. I was tracking some days, but not everyday and figured I would add that into my program so that I would see more results. I was just more determined than ever to make the second 30 days even better!
I gave myself a 5 lbs weight loss goal for the second part of the challenge. This is pretty realistic and I thought doable. However, I weighed myself on Monday and had a bit of "shut the front door" moment. I had NOT lost any weight.
Now, I have been tracking consistently for about 3 weeks and doing the same schedule for work outs. I do different cardio depending on my mood, but I am committing myself to 3 days of cardio. Why have I not lost any weight?? How can this be possible??
The weigh-in is this Sunday and I would like to at least match my 2 lbs loss from the last weigh-in, but I am starting to think that is not even possible.The trainer is going to take a look at my food log and I know she is going to say I am not eating enough and that I need more protein, BUT i am just not hungry!
I have struggled with getting to a point of only eating when I am hungry and thinking about what I am putting into my body and what that means for me. I have been working on this since 2009 and I just can't emotionally go back to eating no matter if I am hungry or not. I am worried that I will revert back to emotional eating.
I really want to lose the weight. I want to be healthy, I want to look good for my brother's wedding, I want to feel good about myself when I look at myself in the mirror. I don't have a lot of money to be able to spend on a personal trainer (oh yea, this program was free for 90 days to a select few folks), individual classes, etc. I belong to a gym and I need to learn to make that work because that is expensive in itself.
I weigh 188lbs and I would like to be at 140lbs. I think I would be happy with that weight - I want to be toned, I want to not get out of breath from walking up the stairs or running.
The other tough part is that my husband says he needs and wants to lose weight, but then he doesn't do anything to make a change. He told me over the summer that me bugging him makes him want to do it less and it makes him mad. He will do it when he is ready. I get that everyone is different, but I really need his support and I just don't feel like I am getting it.
If anyone has any tips or suggestions, please let me know. I have been struggling since 2002 when I really started to put on the weight do to breaking my back. The lowest weight since then was 159lbs - then it slowly just came back.
I am ready and need to figure this out... HELP!