Tuesday, November 19, 2013
I'm proud of myself for standing up to someone who has been ill towards me for a long time now. I finally had enough grief and anxiety over this person and again was treated disrespectfully and verbally abusively two weeks ago. This same person phoned me today and I did not answer it. I left the answering machine take it. Then, later on, she phones again. With present and old feelings from the far past welling up inside... I lose it! I am mad, frustrated, hurt and anxieties on high! This person puts me in a spot where I have to return their call after the message they leave. No one to turn too because I've done that too many times, hoping someone to solve this for me because I don't want to face or deal with this rude, toxic, abusive person! I break down while doing dishes hoping for some kind of internal help from my heart and soul what to do!
Finally! Something empowering came over me right there and now and made me straighten up to be strong and fearless. So the answers did come from within and I found myself calling her back with this new source of assertiveness and courage! I loved every moment of it! During and after the call, I got the respect I so deserve. Teaching her now... how to treat me. No more allowing her to treat me like that ever again! I felt like a mature assertive confident adult rather than a fearful child who bows down to toxic people.