Tuesday, November 19, 2013
So, I got on the scale today, it is afterall, Tuesday. No gain, no loss. Even Steven, given that last week I went to the doctor and was up 3lbs.
But I will take even steven over a gain anyday.
I am taking steps toward seeing a lower number next time, and by steps, I mean walking.
I got my hour in on the cold cold track this morning, and if nothing happens, I will be back at least the next 2 mornings, will have to check the weather after that.
And get a little more prepared, like gloves, head cover, thicker socks, and maybe walking pants instead of capris!!!
The city is in the midst of repairs and they have two places they are tearing up and replacing on my track, so I may have to wait for those repairs, find another track to walk on.
Last night, feeling stressed and irrationally angry, I decided to work it off, so I did some squats, crunches, upper body dumbbell workout and some wall pushups.
While it was only about a 15 minute mini workout, it was pretty nice to find a way to relieve some pent up frustrations, other than dwelling on it.
I am considering going back into counseling, I know I should have long before now, and I know it may or may not help me resolve all these, or especially ONE big issue, it might help me figure out why it still hangs around in my mind.
But it isnt so bad today, I am learning that when others say hurtful things or remind you of hurtful issues, maybe they are hurting inside and want the company to wallow in their self pity, afterall, I have done that to friends and maybe thats why a few of them dont talk to me so much.
I am doing alot better in that regard, I no longer feel the need to share all my issues with anyone but my blogs, my private journal and my self.
I actually feel better, going to the track really helps.
Todays song of the day was not a black, painful deep soul searching song, it was light and fun.
Teenage Dream, Katy Perry.
If we have to have memories, lets try to have some good ones, the walking track is right by my old high school football field and the old swimming pool, where I spent so many days in my youth,
Hearing that song really brought back some good memories of a time when life might have seemed stressful at times, but oh if I had to choose a time in my history to revisit, it would have to be the days of hanging out at the pool, when I had a bikini body, lol.
I loved those days, but like everything else, they came to an end and this too must come to an end, but will live in my mind, as long as they remain good memories, the bad ones have to go... these harboured resentments and anger and unresolved questions, unanswered,
Sometimes you have to just sit it down and walk away,
Feeling so much better!!!!