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Filling My Emotional Bucket

Sunday, November 17, 2013

This weekend my emotions have just hit the proverbial wall. I am usually a very mild-mannered, "nothing gets me down" kind of gal. I help others when I can, and try to practice "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

I have felt this coming for a while, and tried to do something about it. Walking - preferably outside - has always been a great help in the past and doing so has probably helped me not to flatten out like a pancake on the wall.

However, I feel like I have had a slow leak in a bucket and I need to find a way to keep everything from draining out. And I hate, hate, hate feeling like that. It sounds so melodramatic, and I have had quite enough of that this year.

I need to find a way to plug the hole or at least find a way to start adding to the bucket.

I need to find a way to say "I have had enough" rather than feel that others are coming once more to "good old Tammy", or at least I need to find a way not to resent it. Or perhaps I just need to give myself permission to not be Super Tammy today and after a good sleep tonight I will likely feel better.

Yes, I think giving myself permission to not be Super Tammy today will be just the ticket! emoticon
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I don't need to be "Super Tammy" today! As moms, we try to be & do all! And we pay the price! One of the things I changed in my life was stepping back & learning to say no. It was hard at first, but I learned not to jump right in & volunteer for everything. I don't know about you Tammy, but I was the oldest of 5 & that made me the caretaker of the brood. And I've been that way my whole life. I'm the one everyone comes to, to problem solve & take care of things. I suppose I liked being in that role, for most of my life...but it does get stressful. Do whatever is good for you! Lighten your load! You're worth the effort!

    1554 days ago

    Comment edited on: 11/23/2013 5:40:51 AM
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1558 days ago
  • DAS92687
    You are right ... .No-one said you have to be Super Tammy emoticon
    It's perfectly OK to day No sometimes and not even offer an excuse. Take some time to hang out with people who are positive and build you up. We all need to get filled up.
    1558 days ago
    Good girl Tammy. You got it all figured out. (Wish I could). Now just hold on to that thought. emoticon emoticon
    1558 days ago
    Take time off being Super Tammy
    If you don't give yourself some time and attention then you'll have nothing to give others, it's hard sometimes to step back but you really need to occasionally.
    Take care
    1559 days ago
    I feel where you are coming from as I have been there. You are not super tammy today and that is ok. Sometimes resentment is our clue to reassess and you have. Great job seeing just what you need and being able to take care of yourself. TC
    1559 days ago
    Lot and lots of emoticon
    1559 days ago
    There is some great advice here, Tammy, some I wish I'd listened to ten years ago! Practice saying "no," or at least, "I need some time to think first," before going into Superwoman mode.

    Ann Landers, or Dear Abby (I get them mixed up), said something once I've never forgotten:
    People can only take advantage of us if we let them.

    Acknowledging my role in feeling emotionally battered by my family, in my case, has helped me express my need for help at times, instead of always being The Rock :)

    1559 days ago
  • MARGIEH0104
    Tammy...Just remember there is a time to give and a time to receive ! Sounds like you are at your time to receive, so just take in all the friendship and love and let it fill your cup.
    Also be good to yourself and give yourself the love you need, especially right now.
    Nothing is just BE, where you are right now!
    Hugs! emoticon emoticon
    1559 days ago
    emoticon It is so hard to be "Super" Tammy for everyone. It is so hard. Hope that the walking has helped but I'm sure that it isn't a "cure". Step back and emoticon take a day just for Tammy. You need it. Get some rest and you'll be OK. I'll keep you in my prayers.
    1559 days ago
  • PATRICIA4472
    Yes! Take care of Tammy! emoticon

    Remember - there's not just the Golden Rule of "Do unto others...." but also the command to "Love your neighbor AS YOU LOVE YOURSELF." Your care for others has to be built on a strong foundation of self care.... So definitely prioritize some Tammy-care! emoticon
    1559 days ago
    Awwww...Tammy....I feel for you~~

    I have been where you are....and it is not easy when *everyone* expects YOU to *do something* and be the *strong one* and to be as you said~~* Good 'Ol Tammy*

    All that certainly takes it's toll on a person....ALL the walking in the world cannot keep it at bay when it comes flying at you in tons!

    I literally had to *cut myself OFF from all the leachers* It was hard....some of these people resented me and have never returned... ( and I do not miss them )
    Others resented me but over time have gradually returned in my life without coming to *ask* me for something! THEY got the message, I guess.

    So look after TAMMY...Tammy....and know you are LOVED by many!
    1559 days ago

    Comment edited on: 11/18/2013 9:21:12 AM
    Sometimes we all need time to not be everything for other people. tak some time to yourself and recharge.
    1559 days ago
    emoticon By gosh I think you've GOT it!! Trying to be Superwomen gets us in lots of trouble - I'm so glad you figured that out!! Take care of yourself first - THEN you can decide what to give to others!!
    1559 days ago
    It is definitely a good time to say no if others want even a little piece of you.
    It is time to put Tammy at the top of your priority list and when evening comes look back on what YOU accomplished instead of what you RELUCTANTLY did for others.

    Whatever you choose to do, be certain it is what you want to do.
    Just learn to be doing your own thing now.
    Because It's your time now.
    Pat in Maine. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1560 days ago
    Sometimes we need that chance to breakdown ourselves. We can only be strong for so long without breaking. Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself because no one else does . If you can turn someone away (not sure of your situation) it's ok. Explain your plate is full and you just can't do whatever at this time.

    You can't be Super Tammy forever. I'm learning the same thing by having to help out with my parents. One person can only do so much.
    1560 days ago
    Take care of you Tammy and "Just Say NO". emoticon
    1560 days ago
    Take care of yourself. Unplug the phone, etc.

    1560 days ago
  • RICKI157
    Sometimes for your own sanity you have to say no to others and step back and just do what you need to do for you. This has been a lousy couple of weeks for me too and last night and today have been the worst. I am eating because I have to for my Diabetes and then I am going for a walk, a long one and decide what I need to do for me.
    Hope you feel more like you again soon!!!!!!
    1560 days ago
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