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    WENDIBIRD10477   3,641
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I need a lesson in tact...


Friday, November 15, 2013

I like to think of myself as a positive person...I'm known for always looking for the silver lining, of the rainbow in a storm.
Lately, I've noticed that there is quite a bit of negativity in my office. (There are only 3 of us)
One of the gentlemen I work with, never has anything positive to say. He constantly sighs, and curses, and complains. Every time the phone rings, he curses and rants about people being needy, and they need to get their stuff together.
I have been thinking of a way to tactfully tell him that his negativity is a buzz kill, but don't want to upset him, as this is his nature.
One of these days I may just snap and tell him to shut it down, and keep his negativity to himself. He is welcome to his black cloud of negativity, but I don't want to be under it. Like my mom told me, "If you don't have anything nice to day, don't say anything at all."
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
WENDIBIRD10477 11/18/2013 1:44PM

    Thank you everyone for your suggestions!
This person, is just a negative person by personality. He is a very good guy...and once in a while something positive will pop out, and I just use that to get through all the negative times.

If only we all could be built to be happy and smiley all the time! emoticon

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CARMRUN 11/16/2013 7:44AM

    I work in an office of 3 too. One man in also very negative. He is Jewish and believes all Christians are hypocrites. I do pray for him, but I don't have the courage yet to talk to him about it. In God's time. Anyway, he is always swearing or stomping around like a toddler who did not get his way. He has zero patience too. I work there because I'm loyal and a good worker for them, but inside I wish they would retire. They both turn 65 this year. Just stay positive! I do. It's hard sometimes, but I keep thinking, if I keep positive and happy, maybe I'll rub off on them instead of their negativity rubbing off on me.

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HANNAHSGRAMMIE 11/15/2013 9:11PM

    I enjoyed reading the responses from people to whom it had been pointed out that the were "negative." I'm sure we're all like that at times (me--when I don't feel well!!) I like the idea of asking if anything is wrong...you're not your usual self.

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RELISA4HEALTH 11/15/2013 8:42PM

    I once worked with someone who was very negative. Her response was very cutting at times. She was like Jekyll and Hyde and many times when I would go out on break I would cry. Then one day, as I was praying in my car, talking to God about this woman's behavior, the Lord through His Holy Spirit revealed a truth to me. What he said that day turned the situation right around. What I heard in my spirit is," You are not dealing with flesh and blood, but I was dealing with a spirit.( Ephesians 6:12). I was also told that day that what was happening was not a reflection of me, but of her." When I got a hold of this truth, I no longer cried, nor did I feel troubled by her negativity, but I found freedom.
I know that prayer is powerful. I know that the word of God says to pour coals upon their heads. There is a saying," Kill them with kindness."
This man's behavior does not have to be a joy killer. Joy belongs to you and no man can steal it.
You keep your upbeat attitude and your warm smile. The people calling looking for help need this.
Blessings to you. Shine for Jesus.

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PICKIE98 11/15/2013 2:33PM

    I had the same thing as ICEDEMETER.. One person started being negative, but hey left,, but somehow I clung to that stuff.. One person took me for coffee and brought it up. I was so embarrassed that others talked about my attitude! I could have crawled back to work..BUT I apologized to every single person I worked with, it was bout thirty people. hey all were kind, did not seem angry at me, but I was so humbled, thought people seemed to look up to me because I am the senior person working there.. Things are e now back to normal and they even created a new policy that you get three warnings and after that, the boss talks to you,,after that, you are e gone.

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ICEDEMETER 11/15/2013 12:15PM

    I had someone in my office take me for a coffee and ask if I was having any problems and was feeling ok, since it seemed like I "wasn't being my usual cheerful self and was being far more negative in the office". I honestly hadn't noticed anything, but this conversation was enough to make me pay attention to the fact that I really wasn't feeling physically "normal" --- and eventually led to a cancer diagnosis. In the meantime, it also made me pay attention to what I was spewing out in to the office, and keep the negativity in check.

I found the approach to be very caring and sympathetic --- it let me know that my attitude wasn't appropriate for the office, while also allowing that there may be a good reason for the attitude that I could take care of.

I don't know if this would work with the gentleman that you work with, but it certainly was a great approach to me!

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ERINLINDSAY83 11/15/2013 12:05PM

    Tough situation to deal with. And yeah, it is sooo hard to be around people like that...ugh. Hope you figure out a way to work things out!

Have a great weekend!

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