Thursday, November 14, 2013
I'm loving ONEKIDSMOM's series on the rebel. And the difficulties that the rebel causes for maintenance.
Because maintenance is about consistency, right? Which the rebel is not necessarily crazy about. But it may well have been the rebel who initiated the weight loss in the first place: because it's the rebel who tells the obese self, "I'm worth more". And who acts upon that decision. Refusing to "eat socially". Insisting upon making time for exercise. Even when that inconveniences others. And so we need the rebel. Yes we do. We need the rebel alive and well, so we can continue to refuse that social eating pressure, and that pressure to postpone our own needs to care for ourselves. But we need the rebel under reasonable control. As conceptually incoherent as that might sound.
OK then. Let's acknowledge it. The rebel probably helped us lose weight: and the rebel, excessively stifled and dishonoured, can also trigger regain, when the consistency regime becomes too rigid with respect to food, exercise or both. So how can I appropriately nurture my rebel?
I know that preplanning what I'm going to eat helps enormously with sustaining weight loss, because then I'm not facing 200 food choices a day. I've already decided. No choice, no choice, no choice: but still my choice, because I made it.
So, applying the same preplanning strategy, let me accommodate and nurture my rebel by preplanning acts of rebellion. At least one a day.
Preferably a non-calorie act of rebellion, right? Um, the potato chip act of rebellion not optimal?
My generally stuffy "professional" wardrobe is one opportunity for mild rebellion. Today, I'm wearing burgundy tights with an otherwise pretty conventional pencil skirt (leather though) and blazer and bow tie blouse. When I think about, I realize that I do try for one wardrobe rebellion daily. Maybe a silly pin on the lapel (I have a great rhinestone watermellen pin actually), or a pair of stiletto over-the-knee boots, or my bright blue pumps. (You can bet I don't wear any of the above when going to court, however!!)
Other rebellious acts? Bigger ones?
I rebel against the conventionally domestic role assigned to me by my gender. For example (and it's just one example) I don't do dinner parties any more. So done with that. And there are lots more domestic duties that I simply contract out or ignore. Let me count the ways. When all that domesticity was an integral aspect of motherhood, ensuring my kids were nurtured and protected and fed and clothed, I served my time. And now I don't need to. And I won't.
I rebel against the frenzy of Christmas gift shopping. Festive cheques (tiny ones) are good enough. And maybe one tiny tangible thing to go under the tree (now often ordered on line: found the perfect gift for DH and it's on its way). But you know what my kids want and need most? Yup, festive cheques. Easy.
I do (yes I do) fire those troublesome clients, a tiny minority, who cause me grief. Or preferably, refuse to be retained by them in the first place. If I spot them. Politely, firmly: but it's my choice. And I exercise it. Yeah. (Many many people who depend upon income from clients don't. But in my experience, they generate more distraction from real work and overall annoyance than income. So not worth it.)
OK then. Let's honour the spirit of rebellion that got us where we are today. The rebel who makes it possible to maintain.
What are you doing to rebel today? Let's share some great great rebellious ideas!
Rebel recipes!! More useful to me than food recipes: recipes for rebellion!!