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    FERRETLOVER1   203,626
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Wednesday 11-13-2013 Assortment

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

A man died and his three closest friends, Mark, Steve, and Dan, were looking at his body in the coffin.
Mark said, “He was such a good friend. I don’t want him to go to heaven empty-handed.” Then he threw $200 in 20-dollar bills into the coffin.
Steve said, “I agree, so I’ll match that,” and he also threw $200 into the coffin.
Then Dan said, “You guys are so cheap! I’m ashamed of you both. I’m going to give him $1,000!” Dan then wrote a check for $1,400, threw it in the coffin, and took the $400 in bills.
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During weekly visits to my allergist, I've noticed a lot of inattentive parents with ill-behaved children in the waiting room.

So I was impressed one day to see a mother with her little boy, helping him sound out the words on a sign.

Finally he mastered it and his mother cheered, "That's great! Now sit there. I'll be back in 15 minutes."

What did the sign say? "Children must not be left unattended."
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Which two bodies of water are linked by Europe’s Kiel Canal?

The North Sea and the Baltic. The busy 61-mile-long canal cuts across northern Germany, saving ships a long detour around Denmark’s Jutland Peninsula.
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Unsold pilots

DANGER TEAM (1991)
A ball of space goop crash-lands in a sculptor’s studio. Naturally, he molds the goop into three figurines. The figurines come to life, but only the artist can see them. The artist and the goop men team up to fight crime.

AMERICA 2100 (1979)
Two stand-up comedians are accidentally put into suspended animation. They awake at the dawn of the 22nd century to find the world run by a supercomputer with the voice and old jokes of fellow comedian Sid Caesar.
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Highest-grossing film based on a TV show: 2009’s Star Trek, which earned $257 million.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THINFITKINDVGAN 11/13/2013 5:48PM

    And the field of Quantum Science was warped all out of shape because of Startrek 2009. It drove me nuts! LOL

Love the blog. In fact all your blogs. You have a great combination and I look forward everyday to read what you are coming up with for the day. You have a following my dear.

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MISSDAISY23 11/13/2013 3:22PM

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OVERACTIVEELBOW 11/13/2013 2:00PM

    I didn't know that.
Thanks for sharing
Love emoticon and emoticon Audra

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FCARMICH 11/13/2013 11:04AM

  good jokes!

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PDSLIM 11/13/2013 8:57AM

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DESERTDREAMERS 11/13/2013 7:49AM

    Love these things!

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PEGGYO 11/13/2013 7:33AM

    thanks how are you doing?

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SLACHETKA103145 11/13/2013 7:32AM

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