Off the wagon is never a good place to be
Saturday, November 09, 2013
So I came here, to dutifully complete today's blog challenge questions and it became very philosophical and long and drawn out and long and wordy and did I say long? So I didn't post it but read some of your blogs, did some chores and then a nagging something in the back of my mind makes me check and... I missed a shower for a young friend by about 2 hours (now who throws a shower more than 2 months before the wedding and I thought my dd who had to be at that shower was for sure somewhere else today and darn this menopause or perimenopause or whatever it is that has taken over much of my life and memory). And within a very short period I start not feeling well, more than the mental abuse, this is physical, linked to the skipped breakfast which then leads to a poor lunch which is followed by a cookie baking session with me eating sugar cookies and chocolate cookies and a piece of this and all that leads to this. The super duper vitamin powder mixed into water has me feeling better soon (and I was so desperate I didn't even consider if it would be keeping me up later by taking it so late in the day). I still feel bad about missing the shower but I can't fix that, only resolve to do some things differently. Like absolutely take seriously things that are important to me, like the shower, and plan ahead however I have to, no longer relying on the memory power that ain't there. And I have told my dh I absolutely can not skip breakfast (just because I know he will help remind me on those days we fly out of here while it is still dark outside). And I have blogged here, trying to infuse within what has gone on, hoping to stop a pattern that I am very familiar with. I am pulling myself up short, already planing a dinner that will help. I need to face, often it seems, that I am very effected by what I do and don't eat. Not just physically but mentally also. Though I am not crazy about the foods that truly help me, I do so love the mental outcome and emotional stability. I recognized today the hormonal trip, and I am absolutely convinced it has to do with my eating. Then there are some new health issues, and I am just a little miffed, even though I knew of the possibilities and have been avoiding the doctors. Weekly I move making the appt with the new doctor to the next week (so my praying friends please just keep my in your prayers for that one). So I will make myself a good dinner now and try to do damage control. I will work on really getting hold of these "disorderly" eating patterns (thanks doglady! really do love that description) and I will thank God for always being here by my side.