Saturday, November 09, 2013
I have not written here in awhile, I have a blog that I do try to write in once a week but I have been going through some changes in my life, some good changes.
Back in Sept. I got very sick , and I had blood tests they could not find anything wrong with me, finally after visiting my primary doctor, she had some more tests done on me, and all my levels were way off , my thyroid was off big time, my liver enzymes were up, my white blood cell count was high, it seemed like I was just falling apart.
My doctor talked to me about anxiety, as most people know that past four years have been very hard on me with my husband struggling with unemployment, he is not the problem , I am blessed to have a diligent husband who is looking for work and is going to school. The past few years I have taken all the responsibility on myself and I was just worn out and my body was giving me warning signs , I truly felt like I was dying.
My doctor referred me to a therapist I have had three visits and I am discovering a lot of things , my doctor offered me anti depressants but I am fighting this I do not need a pill to help me feel better, and bottom line was I did not want to be this way.
I am learning how to handle anxiety and stress and how to lose weight even in stressful circumstances, I am making progress, the biggest change is I am not putting all types of expectations on myself because when I do, I get upset when the expectation is not met.
I am down a total of 37 lbs now, and I am learning every day on how to cope and do things, my husband has a new job he is starting this week, it is only part time but I am thankful that it is a job and we are just believing a full time position will come soon.
My goal this month is to take time for myself but more than that something that is not work, I have been doing everything just to survive for so long that I have forgotten how to separate work from play, love, and joy. So, I am going to re learn that this month and teach myself how to live and enjoy things again for myself.