Thursday, November 07, 2013
I know many of you here have followed my writings about my Mother and Sister. Geez it is hard sometimes to deal with family. My mother hates my DH and the two of them haven't been in the same space in over 3 years. It all started back when I was getting so sick and in and out of the hospital and they still weren't sure what was wrong with me. At the time my Mother lived in Mexico. My Mother had written me a nasty email and said some awful things to me all over an airline ticket that my DH had ordered for her on line when we all were coming up for the holidays one year. In the past my DH would many times pay for her ticket but at this particular time we weren't in a position to do so and I asked her to pay for her own. Well she went completely off on me and said that it wasn't fair as we spent money on his sons and grandchildren and that she was family and she expected us to pay for her. Now this is the same mother that spent $150,000 adding onto my sister's house to move into and lived there 7 months and my sister even charged her rent after that to live there. My mother is fortunate and has her own money. Anyway my DH sent her a nasty email and she has never forgiven him and works hard to get people to not like him. Fortunately my DH just ignore it all. But my mother is constantly bashing him to my cousins and all. It really isn't fair. My DH wants to just let it pass and move forward. He doesn't like that I am put in the middle and it creates stress for me. My sister is really "working" it though. She and her husband love that mom spent all this money on their house and then they convinced her to move into a retirement community so she will be around more people. When I was out with my sister and mom shopping I noticed my sister buying things on my Mom's credit card and my mother offering to pay for gas, etc. I really don't care about the money but my sister is really taking advantage of the fight between my mother and DH and is going overboard to do things for mom to get money. I am so glad I don't have to be around it much as I live in Mexico. But here is the worst part...which I haven't shared with you all here......and that is that my mother knows that I was engaged to another man whom I loved and my sister slept with him while I was away on a business trip....yep, what a soap opera! Geez, we are talking Jerry Springer. Of course I dropped the guy and moved forward and thank goodness I did as I now have a wonderful DH. And I worked hard to try and forgive my sister....but now with watching her "work" my mother and the two of them "hating" my DH is makes me sick. All of this is on my mind as I was trying again to just get everyone past this. I am having a get together with my cousins and their families and want to have it here in the new "man cave" my DH totally built himself. It's a great space. Anyway, called my Mom to tell her about it and she went on about how she wouldn't be comfortable in the same space with my DH. So I just said "forget it"....I am not even going to try and push it. I say "so be it". Funny part is that with my disorders my Mother knows I am supposed to avoid stress. I told her this and she doesn't get it.
So sorry for the soap box......just had to get this all out. Thanks for listening...I now feel better. I can't change my Mother or Sister....I can only change how I react and I choose not to let them get to me.
Hope you all have a terrific day. It's really overcast here in Philly. But not too chilly.