Wednesday, November 06, 2013
As I watched this poor woman talk about how she was victimized by that MONSTER Ariel Castro my heart couldn't help but break for her the vicious things he did to her and what broke my heart the most was her knowing her family wasn't looking for her and how he kept throwing it in her face.
Part of me couldn't help but feel blessed as I was almost abducted as a child on the way walking to school when I was in the first grade. Everytime I hear one of these horror stories it brings me back to that day when I was almost taken. It runs like a video in my mind clear as day of how my heart was beating rapidly running to school and the girl that use to get paid to walk me to school telling me not to tell anyone at school of what just happened. The teacher asking me over and over again what was wrong with me as I must of looked like I'd just seen a ghost and I repeatedly said nothing, but I remember having cried all the way to school that morning.
I'm not sure why the girl told me not to tell , maybe it's because she had me walking so far ahead of her as she was a fifth grader and probably didn't want to be seen with me only in first grade, maybe she thought she'd get in trouble.
I remember going home and telling my mother and her not believing me because Susan didn't say anything when she walked me home, how I was told I'd get a beaten if I was lying and waiting in a chair for her to call Susan's mother and hoping Susan would tell the truth of me almost being abducted so I wouldn't catch a beaten for telling the truth.
I started to cry when the girl said that her family didn't care about her because I could so relate to that, I mean who questions a first grader on making up such an elaborate story of almost being abducted???? I mean it wasn't common back in those days as it is now or at least you didn't hear about it like you do now.
I was always a scared little girl after that hiding in the house when the door knocked (my mother always telling me it could be someone trying to steal me) and I remember begging my dad at times to take me in the store with him instead of leaving me in the car for what seemed hours at times. I use to be so scared when someone came near the car I'd hide where your feet go and try to curl up like a ball so I wouldn't be seen , I think I was in fear of the man that didn't get me that day and maybe seeing me again and taking me because I got away.
My heart is sick at what that girl went through during those 11 years of captivity, just like it was when the other girl who was gone for almost 20 yrs. I thank god that I wasn't taken that day, but that fear has always lived inside of me.
As a young woman in my 20 's I was followed a lot by men I think because I was always chesty, I don't think men realize the fear they can put into a woman or maybe some just feed off that as power.
I hope this poor woman can find some peace in her life, she's such a strong woman to have endured the torture she did , I'll keep her in my prayers.
She had me wondering had I been taken that day if my family would of kept trying to look for me or if they just wouldn't of cared like my mom that night when I came home and told her what happened, she really made me feel so unloved, but then again she always said things to make me feel bad about myself.
It is because of that day I had my son take karate so he'd never feel as hopeless as I did that day, so he'd be better prepared if some MONSTER tried to take him at least he'd have a clue of what to do.
I feel good about the money spent for those classes, I know they helped put me into some debt but I don't regret ever spending the money, he has a 2nd degree junior black belt and it makes me feel good knowing that.
My prayers go out to Michelle Knight the other girls in that house and every child that isn't home sleeping in their own beds because of a MONSTER wondering the streets.