Monday, November 04, 2013
It kinda hurt to just take down the pictures of my 20, 40, 50, 60, 70 & 80 lb goals, but I feel that it's not fair to keep them up. Yes I earned them previously but now I'm starting over and I'll need to earn them again. I'm sure I will eventually but I guess that could give me perspective of why I need to pay attention to me at all times. Not get sucked into the emotional games that I've been sucked into in the past.
I've done that dance with those people in particular most of my life, and I subsequently have been overweight most of my life. Its time to stop giving away my power. And in the moment that is a very easy thing for me to say, but it's always a very difficult thing for me to do. There is a part of me that wants to keep my journey here private and secretive from those people in my life for fear that they will attempt to sabotage me even further, and there is another part of me (that's kind of a brat) that says "Effe them" and almost wants to challenge them. But the adult in me knows that is nothing more than self sabotage and so I'll quietly type away and share my journey with those of you that are on a similar path. Thanks for reading, for all of your support and for sharing your stories.