Advertisement -- Learn more about ads on this site.

    SOULFISH80   14,092
10,000-14,999 SparkPoints

Nitty gritty

Sunday, November 03, 2013

So, did some serious self facing today. Haven't changed my weight ticker since May of this year. Which means I haven't lost any weight since May of this year. I was under the impression for quite some time that I was the same weight I'd been for the last two years give or take 5 pounds here and there. My scale wasn't working for a few months, so I had no conrete way to track my weight. I went back to my weight tracker from May, and according to what I weighed last Monday, I gained 24 pounds from May to November. I did loose 4 of those pounds this week. So that is an even 20 pound gain in 6 months. I'm trying to not be in denial. It started with going gluten free, then the blood donation fiasco, and now my busted ankle that has kept me from exercising to my full capacity for 3 weeks now. So, I accept the reality. Am a bit sad that this happened, but am really glad that I have a plan to remedy the situation. If this had happened before I found SP I think I would be about to crawl out of my skin in desperation. But, I'm facing the facts and putting my plan for goal attainment into place. I've been doing well in many ways, and just need to continue. I wouldn't have lost the 4 pounds this week if I wasn't currently on track, so I must keep this up. I also stopped taking my medication. And am relying on it at an as needed basis, which is what it is intended for anyway. This is the 5th day without it, and the hunger pangs are noticeably lessened. (Gained over 80 pounds in 4 years after begining to take this medicine on a daily basis.)

So, even though change, and excitement and joy and all kinds of great things are swirling about me, must not put my weight/health on the back burner. And I'm not planning to. I've already got next weeks meals planned, and have been sticking to my calorie range everyday for a few weeks now. I have been getting relatively steady fit mins in, considering I'm still not stable on my ankle. And I've been making a solid effort to drink and track 8+ cups of water per day. Not too bad. I know the last 6 months have been filled with some pitfalls, and it has negatively affected my weight/health, but the last 6 months are over. New chapter, new life, new future, new me. I hope the 4 pound loss this week is just the begining of greater and greater health for my future.

So, there it is, honest, not too much self loathing. Accepting the facts without wallowing in the poor me/why me/or damn me aspects of weight gain. I feel the winds of positive change in my life. And it all starts with me. I've finally adjusted my weight tracker to accurately reflect where I am, right now, today. So, that is a step in the right direction, denial got me nowhere, and fast.

Have a beautiful Sunday. Hugs. Cheers.

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
JSPIN74 11/6/2013 2:12PM

    good reflection & planning on what to do going forward without beating up on yourself! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ME_HERE_NOW 11/4/2013 8:07AM

    all you can do is wake up every day and take life from where it is, formulate the plan that will make you feel the best, and press forward. we can learn from the past, but only if we don't beat ourselves up for it. i am trying to remind myself of this every day. xoxo. i really hope your new life lifts you up on the winds of happiness girl!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HIPPICHICK1 11/4/2013 8:05AM

    I love how you just ditched the past and all of the feelings that could have been connected with it. You rock!! That is a lesson in not being attached if I ever saw one. Have you been listening to dharma talks?

Report Inappropriate Comment
RORYLYONS 11/3/2013 11:44PM

    Yippee you can do this...... emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHERYL_ANNE 11/3/2013 6:50PM

    Hoorah for going back to the basics:

Tracking all your nutrition
Drinking at least 64 ounces of water a day
Portioning out your food with a digital kitchen scale and measuring spoons
Staying within your caloric range every day

This will go a long way towards getting you back to where you want to be.

Can't do the exercise that SP expects you to? Adjust your tracker to reflect that. Yes, it will remove some calories per day but it will give you a better foundation to work from until you can move your body again.

You can do this!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MERRYMARY42 11/3/2013 3:28PM

    I know how it is to lie to myself about what I eat, weigh and how much I exercise, what is the deal? the only one it bothers is me,

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHAMROCKY2K 11/3/2013 1:59PM

    YEAH for accentuating the positive! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SYDLETZIII 11/3/2013 1:55PM

    Do not think much about the fact that you gained weight or the number, rather focus on the only true fact that counts. If you can gain it, you can also lose it. Good luck on your new journey to permanently lose those pounds.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BIGPAWSUP 11/3/2013 1:08PM

    I know you can turn things around. You are tough and strong - I know you can do it.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUNEAU2010 11/3/2013 12:40PM

    Good thing you stopped that slide before it went on for even more pounds!
Thanks for sharing. I am having that kind of self-discussion myself!

Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

Log in to post a comment.

Other Entries by SOULFISH80