Thursday, October 31, 2013
So, I already wrote a blog entry for day four but my computer decided to break before I had a chance to post it. I'm now typing on my tablet, which is pretty difficult so my blogs will be short until my computer gets fixed, which will probably be a while since my family is having financial issues right now.
So yesterday (day 4) was an emotional hell hole. Like I mentioned earlier, my family is going through some pretty rough times with money and it made me feel really upset. So I ate breakfast, but couldn't bring myself to eat lunch since I was too stressed. I went for two walks instead of eating, however I talked myself into eating when I got home from my walks and ate a healthy dinner. I was under my calorie limit for day so I decided to eat an apple to push me to about 1200 calories. So yesterday ended up being a pretty okay day.
Today, (Happy Halloween by the way! (: ) I gave into the scale and weighed myself. To be honest, I really needed to weigh myself just to ease my mind. I know it my heart this program will help me lose weight, but my disorder needed to see it with its own eyes. I'm down almost three pounds from Sunday. (: and its not even the end of the week yet! This is awesome. I love this program. I get to actually eat AND lose weight, this is an eating disorders worst nightmare and I love it. I love how I'm winning and not the stupid voice in my head. :D
I ate a good breakfast this morning, went for a walk, had a snack, and now I'm going bowling with my best buddy for Halloween. I'll probably eat while I'm out so I need to make healthy decisions. And when I get home I'm watching a scary movie with my brother. Low cal popcorn here I come! :D
I just can't get carried away now with food. I always lose weight, go easy on myself, binge, and then the cycle of an eating disorder starts again. Well not this time! This time, I will be successful. (:
I just wanted to tell you guys how much I love all of you. Your words and comments are so inspiring and motivating me. You guys are truly incredible and I am so grateful to be surrounded by such supporting people. (: