Wednesday, October 30, 2013
I love Bikram yoga. I love being done with Bikram yoga. I love feeling strong while I am doing Bikram yoga. But I hate that I love it. I would much rather be anywhere else than in a 105 degree room exercising.
After a long absence, I finally made it back to yoga on Sunday afternoon. The first class was hard, I left defeated. At no other time did I realize just how far I set myself back having a 3 month vacation from my healthy lifestyle. Not only was I not at the same place I was when I stopped Bikram (in June!), but I couldn't make it through the class without sitting. I got nauseous, felt dizzy. I was truly a beginner again.
I went again last night and did much better. I didn't have to sit at all. I didn't get sick to my stomach. I was able to do all the poses in some fashion.
The thing I love about yoga, especially Bikram where you do the same routine each time, is that you really can see the incremental improvements every time you go in a way that you can't when you are running or strength training. One week, you struggle to grab your foot in a pose, the next week it is easier, the next week you are moving on to the next movement. There was one pose, standing bow, where I struggled to grab my foot from behind. I could only do it with an assist from the wall. I got to the place when I was going to Bikram regularly where I could do standing bow without the wall for assistance. That felt great. Now I am back at the wall. So even though I might look like the same bumbling fat girl in the yoga class to a casual observer, I know where I was, where I am now, where it is possible to go.
I was hoping to go Sunday/Tuesday/Thursday but since tomorrow is Halloween, maybe Friday instead.
Spark on, friends.