Thursday, October 24, 2013
I know I've been MIA lately. In all honesty, I've been depressed about my injury and living in chronic pain, seeing no light at the end of this tunnel. And I've regained 30# of the 80 I lost last year. Sucks. But only I did it. And only I can change it.
My husband and I drove to Seattle Monday afternoon for yet another surgery consult with yet another surgeon. After 3 doctors telling me I'm "inoperable", my hopes were not set high. But we were shocked! She said Yes! Not only does she feel confident in repairing my very large hernia in one long, aggressive surgery, but she feels that the outcome long-term can be a good one. She feels that my "apron" of fat/skin from losing so much weight (about 160# from my highest weight right now) is impacting the hernia repairs. Having that much weight hanging and pulling down on the meshes has compromised them. She doesn't want to repair it for a 5th time without removing this barrier. So..... I'm getting it removed in surgery!
Surgery has been booked out 5 months, for 2 reasons:
1) I currently only have 6 weeks of FMLA left. It renews to 12 weeks in March. I will need about 10 weeks off work for the surgery and recover.
2) I need to lose nearly 50#. Every pound I lose before surgery will improve the outcome.
So.... while I continue in chronic pain, I am again HOPEFUL. Hope is everything. It has changed my outlook, my emotion, and my motivation. I can do this! I've done it once, I can do it again!