Wednesday, October 23, 2013
It's always an interesting experience to meet people in real life who you met online. What will they be like? Will they look like the pictures? Will their real manner of speaking, expressing, being match their online voice? What will they think of me when making those same calculations??
Tomorrow I get a chance to meet some of my virtual friends in real life. Friends who've supported me through thick and thin--literally and figuratively. We started out on another site before SP, going on 10 years ago....
And I'm worried about whether these pants make my butt look big. Ack!! LOL!
In our time together, I've weighed more. I've weighed less. Where I am now is a place where I should weigh less--but I'm also pretty happy. Most of the time.
But then the self-doubt creeps in. Should I be happy? Am I settling? Will they think OMG, how can she be deluding herself??
Am I? Should I be more upset, so I can fuel more of a change?
And then I breathe.
If that's what it takes--being upset, hating myself thin--I don't want it.
I am healthy. I am active. I can buy clothes I like. I like my life....
I like these pants. :-)