Pam, you know you are different than a lot of people. You have tried a lot of things...some even a little kooky...but the way you are now...about average. You need to get off this weight for your health but don't let it stress you out. As long as you know you are trying, it doesn't make any difference what others think. Oh I know you would like everyone to think that you are awesome but it is even more important what you think. As far as caring..you have a heap of that. You don't eat right and have not found your right portions...yet. That is still in the works.
You have done a lot of stupid things but that has made you who you are.
Being frustrated and stressed out has caused a lot of health problems but you are getting a handle on that. You have to take each day as it comes. The van has been not starting off and on but then it does...not so bad. If it goes out we will have to deal with it but worrying about it won't fix it.
I have decided that you need to take each day and see it as an adventure. Maybe like Alice felt in Wonderland. Exploring a new world and seeing it not with just your eyes but feeling with your heart and experiencing it with your soul.
Meet new people on spark as they are led your way because they are brought to you by and unseen hand. It is up to you to find out why or just take it as a meaningful experience and not analyse it.
So many, including me, are stressing out about weight and that is just adding to the frustration of putting back the pounds. make it a journey of excitement and wonder. Our bodies are made to move and to be leaner and stronger yet for many years you pushed it with the eating and let it droop without movement. It will take time to reverse those effects. so take the day find the positive, explore your options and experiment and focus on the results.
if you let yourself get down into a funk , it will only cause you to cease movement and stuff your face instead of finding your correct portions. There is some reason you are not losing or that you are gaining so find it and change it. It is , after all, your life. give it heck! Get it on the right track and keep it there. Today is a new day and if you need to, find a new way.
The years have flown by and find me exploring the whys
that I have let myself and my body down.
I have been obsessing over the past and who gave
me the permission to ruin such a beautiful body
When it was given to me, it was perfect.
But in the past I have let myself down with
all the overindulgent ways.
Time to rectify that by finding the path I must go
down to bring that body back to life.
I want to experience what it could feel like
but also not forget to live in the moment
Waiting for my body to find itself is
not a good reason to put my life on hold
being frustrated and demanding
It is a moment in time to see around me
all the positive that is there
and will help to create my life
as I want to live it.
Believe in yourself and just do it!
Life is all around you. Come out of your shell and experience it. Don't obsess on the negative but find your positive.
See the miracles that are all around you. feel the connection with life, nature and those around you.