Sunday, October 20, 2013
If you've been following me for a while, you know I've got some issues with portion control. I've been getting insight on this challenge, and it steered me to the discovery that each time I eat, I gravitate to an old memory of overindulging in the food that I'm eating or a similar food.
What a sad thing, right? Instead of focusing on how special the food is in front of me, I've been focusing on how I overindulged in the past and fulfill old prophecies.
Well, no more! I'm working on accepting my past (it is a part of me, and I can't change that) and embracing the present. Case in point: blackberries.
If I'm eating a bowl of berries, I can't help but think of my summer in Oregon a few years back. I'm brought to the times when I had low blood sugar working in the lab and stumbled outside and across the street to a rogue blackberry bush. I would eat berry after berry until I was stuffed! It was delicious, but it was definitely not one serving.
Well, fast forward to now: I just had a big bowl of berries for breakfast, and those thoughts started creeping back up in my mind. I shoved them down and focused on how my mom had taken time to pick all these berries back home and sent them back to school with me in Ziploc baggies to be frozen for a rainy day. Well, this is that rainy day (actually, it's pretty foggy, not rainy), and I can feel the sunshine and love in this bowl. I can feel the shift towards appreciating this food, accepting the past, and enjoying the present.