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SKINNYINMYHEAD
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I'm not special.. but I did drop100lbs!

Saturday, October 19, 2013


This is my journey in pictures of losing 100lbs and finding my strength (both physical and mental)... I'll write a blog with more specifics at another time... You can find most of my story via my blogs.. and my story?? involves A LOT of failure.. I mean it.. a lot of "passionate", "I'm ready" failure.. I'm not done yet.. and I'm not even sure "where" or "what number" will be "done"... but I'll know it when I get there..

One thing I want y'all who are struggling to know is that I am *not* special.. I'm not.. no fairy dust was sprinkled on me.. I didn't do anything that you can't do! One of the things people say to me that irritates me is "isn't it amazing what you can do when things 'click'" or "you must have been ready this time"? (or something to that effect)... and the truth is that I was no more "ready" this time than the other times... I was no more passionate this time than the other times.. listen to me closely.. THERE WAS NO CLICK... That's right... NO CLICK.. there wasn't a day I woke up and went "I"ve got it! I've got THE CLICK" LOL... In a nutshell, I found an eating plan that agreed with my body in an epic way (Paleo) and I stuck with it (and am sticking with it), I found a workout that kept my interest and challenged me in ways nothing else ever has (CrossFit) and I found a COACH (not a trainer, a COACH), an expert to help me through the hardest part about losing 100lbs - THE MENTAL CHALLENGE.

A special thanks to the peeps who have followed my blogs.. and encouraged me throughout this journey... I would name names but y'all know who you are... and I cannot say enough how much your comments, goodies and status comments meant to me... I have read them hundreds of times by now.. they helped me when I had "low" moments... so THANK YOU... and I hope I do you all proud by paying it forward...

Below are my 2010 and 2011 previous attempts... where I was completely 100% motivated but ultimately not successful... Sparkpeople and my blogs are a chronicle of past attempts...

January 1, 2011
Losing 100lbs in a year... this year.. LOG.MOVE.LIFT.SWEAT.REPEAT:
wk 20 5-22-11 now i know - wish I didn't
wk 19 5-15-11 don't know didn't weigh
wk 18 5-8-11 don't know didn't weigh
wk 17 5-1-11 don't know didn't weigh
wk 16 4-24-11 289 lbs -0 lbs - 14 YTD 40.3 BMI
wk 15 4-17-11 289 lbs -1 lbs -14 YTD 40.3 BMI
wk 14 4-10-11 290 lbs -0 lbs -13 YTD 40.4. BMI
wk 13 4-3-11 - 290 lbs -3 lbs - 13 YTD 40.4 BMI
wk 12 3-27-11 -293 lbs -0 lbs -10 YTD 40.9 BMI
wk 11 3-20-11 - 293 lbs -0 lbs -10 YTD 40.9 BMI
wk 10 3-13-11 - 293 lbs -0 lbs -10 YTD 40.9 BMI
wk 10 body fat 39% that's down 6% of body fat!!!!
wk 9 3-6-11 - 293 lbs -2 lbs -10 YTD 40.9 BMI
wk 8 2-27-11 - 295 lbs -0 lbs -8 YTD 41.1 BMI
wk 7 2-20-11 - 295 lbs -0 lbs -8 YTD 41.1 BMI
wk 6 2-13-11 - 295 lbs -0 lbs -8 YTD 41.1 BMI
wk 5 2-6-11 - 295 lbs -0 lbs -8 YTD 41.1 BMI
wk 5 body fat % 45% - started with personal trainer for ST
wk 4 1-30-11 - 295 lbs -0 lbs -8 YTD 41.1 BMI
wk 3 1-23-11 - 295 lbs -3 lbs -8 YTD 41.1 BMI
wk 2 1-16-11 - 298 lbs -2 lbs -5 YTD 41.6 BMI
wk 1 1-9-11 - 300 lbs -3 lbs -3 YTD 41.8 BMI
wk 0 1-1-11 - 303 lbs 42.3 BMI

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January 17th, 2010
I've been having this feeling (you might want to put on the Black eye'd Peas "I gotta feeling" as a bit of mood music)...
I've had it for a couple of weeks..
it's hard to define but it's a positive feeling..
it's an expectation..
it's an assurance...
and it is effecting all my senses...
my focus is laser sharp..
my outlook is expectant...
I feel this "thing" deep deep inside..
I can't exactly describe it..
but when I look for words..
unstoppable and relentless come to mind..
closely followed by DONE..

I feel DONE..

not just done..
but DONE.. DONE DONE..
it's like a switch has been flipped..

no longer am I intimidated by the extra 100lbs I carry
I'm CHALLENGED by it!
no longer am I discouraged by the length of time it will take me to lose it
I'm FOCUSED on one day, one week, one month at a time!
no longer am I defeated by what I can't do,
I'm DOING what I can do
no longer do I feel like each attempt to move forward is like pulling a ton of bricks
I'm PROPELLED towards my goal
no longer am I feeling like I can't do anything right and everything is hopeless -
I can do ANYTHING and the hope is HERE and NOW not in the future somewhere..

This time is different. I'm different.

I'M DONE!
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Annie
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • v PONYFARMER
    I have missed a ton of your posts. Been super busy and a bit unfocused. Reading your blogs has refocused me. So thank you. Will have to come back often and reread your blogs for more information.
    887 days ago
  • v ADVENTURE-GIRL
    Wowzer! I haven't been on Sparkpeople that much over the last year and didn't know how successful you've been. Congrats! You look amazing and I know you must feel amazing too!

    887 days ago
  • v ITSMAYHEM
    I want to know how you found your coach, and how you started exercising at 300+.. and I hope you don't mind sharing? :D
    957 days ago
  • v TIGER_LILY_613
    This is WONDERFUL ! Congratulations ! emoticon emoticon
    975 days ago
  • v STEPH-KNEE
    What a beautiful vlog from a beautiful person (inside and out)! I am so proud of you and am just amazed by your amazing strength (both mentally and physically)! I know, I have known you are amazing for a long time now, but you continue to knock my socks off and inspire me daily! So proud of you gorgeous!! :D emoticon
    998 days ago
  • v MINANCY
    Congratulations. I read "uncomfortable is where the magic happens" and had a profound moment. Thank you for sharing.
    999 days ago
  • v TREV1964
    This is fantastic Annie,

    What you have done is truly inspiring and you are winning. I personally am coming up close to 100lbs lost and I still have 80 to do.

    I would not have fount this blog and vlog if it wasn't for the previous poster who very kindly emailed me a link to it so thanks to Muscle up as well as admiration for the attitude you have shown so far.

    Cheers

    Trev
    999 days ago
  • v MUSCLE-UP
    Dang! You have chains tied to those big old weights. You looks so good! Congrats on being 100 lbs. down. It does take a special person like you to not turn back and to keep plugging away. It called being a Winner by all rights!
    999 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/27/2013 2:28:32 PM
  • v HAPPYJUNEBUG
    Awesome video! Just loved it. Yes, I've read up on paleo and saw many people doing those squat lifts that you do in your video.

    Excellent!

    Tha
    nks for sharing this video.


    :hug!: So proud of you!


    Have a good weekend!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    Junie
    100+ Pounds Team
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1000 days ago
  • v BARKLESSWAGMORE
    I totally know what you *meant* when you said you are not Special. You want all of us to know that you are like every one of us and that we can be successful too. But.......ummmmmmmm.......Annie? You are so very very special to me. My personal journey both here on SPark and in my everyday life has changed and you are one of the reasons that I now feel the specialness in me shining through. You know what you do for me besides inspire and motivate me? You CRACK ME UP and, most importantly, you make me think, research and learn. Thank you my friend!
    1003 days ago
  • v IRISHBEANERGAL
    OMG I cried when i watched this.. I've been there.. and I've still got a ways to go too - but thank you for sharing the honesty - even though I logically knew I wasn't the only one, you just cemented it for me with your video (Guess I'm a visual learner).

    THANK YOU

    ~Irish

    ps - found you through getstrongrrr - and have added you as a friend. I hope you will do the same. Be well.
    1003 days ago
  • v LOOKINGTOBEFIT
    Loved this Annie!! You are a true inspiration emoticon emoticon
    1003 days ago
  • v LOLABLACK69
    Thank you for sharing and for teaching me a lesson or two about hard work... emoticon
    emoticon
    1004 days ago
  • v IXCHEL23
    Totally.... emoticon emoticon emoticon
    I almost cried at the end. emoticon emoticon
    I wish I had the inner strength you have!
    1004 days ago
  • v MINDYSUE65
    WOW! I beg to differ, YOU ARE SPECIAL!! Thank you for sharing, you are such an inspiration, you make me want to try cross fit!
    1004 days ago
  • v KAJERO
    I beg to differ. You are amazingly special. Below is a an incomplete list of things that make you special! How many people can say the things in the list below?

    - Sticking to it to lose weight.
    - Mentally and physically challenging yourself.
    - Creating an incredible video.
    - Sharing all that you accomplished and inspiring us to incorporate those things in our weight loss journey.


    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    You have truly inspired me today. I think maybe it is time for me to put more effort into my weight loss journey.
    1004 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/22/2013 12:46:48 PM
  • v DETERMINEDDE
    You are amazing! Way to do it and inspire others. Thank you for sharing your journey!
    1005 days ago
  • v GONNAMAKE3
    Amazing!
    1005 days ago
  • v CRUZ4U
    That was a fantastic video!!! So awesome to see your journey so far!
    1005 days ago
  • v PHOENIX1949
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1005 days ago
  • v JECKIE
    Annie, you made me cry. I am SO proud of you! Seeing where you came from, and knowing the woman you are now... it's just amazing!


    1005 days ago
  • v TEKRU1
    emoticon Great job! Keep up the good work - you are an inspiration!
    1005 days ago
  • v OJIBWEEQUAY
    YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    1005 days ago
  • v TRIXIETEXAS
    Love your video! You are amazing, wonderful, inspiring! I'm proud of you, but I know that the most important thing is that you are proud of yourself.

    Christina
    1006 days ago
  • v LJCANNON
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1006 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/21/2013 8:12:26 AM
  • v DEBSZOO74
    Annie, you are amazing!!! emoticon
    1006 days ago
  • v STRONGDJ
    Annie,
    I love this so much. You just keep going and growing in so many ways.

    Love the song too--her struggles to get back to singing were resonate with me just as your struggle is resonate with me. The changes you have made are amazing...just like you!

    So much love and admiration for you!
    DJ
    1006 days ago
  • v MAMACHAMBS
    OMG Annie!! You are a beast! Thank you for inspiring me to be the best ME I can be! My first burpees last Friday weren't much better than your first. Three weeks ago I couldn't do 10 real push ups, Last Friday I did 30!! Real ones!! Remembering that helps me believe my burpees will get prettier too. Your transformation, both physically mentally and emotionally, is astounding! Your story tells us all that we CAN do this, no matter how many pounds we need to lose or how weak we may be to begin with. Thank you for helping me find my inner strength!
    1006 days ago
  • v JUNEAU2010
    Wow! Thanks for sharing. I have not felt that "click" and I have NOT been doing anything to move forward. Feeling down, wondering what is broken inside of me. Perhaps the answer is one I don't want to hear: just do it!
    1006 days ago
  • v _COSMOPAULATAN_
    Have I mentioned how proud I am of you? Or how much I am in awe, complete awe, of you? You are amazing and I am honored to be your friend. emoticon
    1006 days ago
  • v FUNLOVEN
    What a great video, Annie! Congrats on the reaching the 100 mark. You may not think your special, but I am glad you are my SP friend and I can't begin to tell you how happy and proud I am of you emoticon I can tell in your writing that you really are a new person now.
    1007 days ago
  • v NANCYJH64
    Such a great and inspiring video. Thank you soooo much
    1007 days ago
  • v ZEECHA
    I think you're special, Annie--you didn't give up. Yes, you have fallen down, but you've gotten back up! Not everybody does that.

    That's so cool that you made this video. And may I just say that your butt looks GREAT! Dang! You go girl!

    Thanks for sharing!
    1007 days ago
  • v AMARILYNH
    Not special????? I BEG to differ!! You are amazing and wonderful. But I hear what you are saying - we ALL have it in us to be special!! And I also agree with something else I inferred - that our BODIES are different and what works for one won't be the 'click' for everyone!!

    But SOMETHING will work for everyone - its just a matter of keeping on with trying different things (and not just for a week - giving them a REAL try) until we find the right one. And it WILL NOT be a pill, or a supplement or an easy fix - it has to be a way of life we can live for the rest of our lives!!

    I'm so happy you have found yours - you totally ROCK!!!
    1007 days ago
  • v STRONG_SARAH
    Who says you're not special?! You did something fantastic for yourself and will inspire many people. Sounds special to me! emoticon
    1007 days ago
  • v AVAMARIE62
    Annie, You inspire me! Next time I am uncomfortable at the gym I 'll will remember that then is when magic happens! emoticon
    Have a great day!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    emoticon
    1007 days ago
  • v ADVENTURESEEKER
    emoticon Way to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    1007 days ago
  • v ETTEZEUS
    AWESOME!! You rock in my book!
    You are amazing!
    And now, you are unstoppable!
    keep at it girl!
    Just keep going!!

    1007 days ago
  • v STR458
    you are a star emoticon emoticon
    1007 days ago
  • v SUGAR0814
    emoticon Your story is so inspirational! Thank you for sharing!
    1007 days ago
  • v KAT130
    Good luck on your journey. I have lost and gained a few times, this time, I'm hoping for a permanent weight loss. I'm wishing you success, and that you never have to start over again.
    1007 days ago
  • v KATI5668
    Great ..thank you for sharing. Indeed dedication has paid off for you..tis a wonderful story. & congrats to your coach for pushing you when you needed it & for being there thru all ..& for continuing to be at your side!

    emoticon emoticon
    1007 days ago
  • v GETSTRONGRRR
    Holy Moly Sister, that was awesome! Not only can you squat heavy weights, push big trucks, and zip across the African savannah, but you can make and edit pretty cool videos too!

    That was great to see and you've literally worked your a$$ off for this success! Big Congrats Beast-Girl!
    1007 days ago
  • v CATLOVER110
    Very inspirational! Thanks for sharing! emoticon
    1007 days ago
  • v WOUBBIE
    Ya made me cry again! I remember all those milestones like they were my own. Tell your Coach I said "Thanks" too!
    1007 days ago
  • v MARMAERT
    Yeah, Annie! You have done an awesome job and deserve all the joy that getting rid of 100 # brings to you! I am so proud of your accomplishments and wish you more enjoyable uncomfortable moments (even if you are a Sassy shamrock Sheriff!) emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1007 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.