This morning was my weekly weigh-in and my monthly measurements. It wasn't pretty. The only thing that went down was the circumference of my waist. Just about everything else went up! Seriously...wtf?!
I, of course, burst into tears because this week especially has been super challenging. My husband is awesome and reminded me that even still, I haven't wavered in getting up at 5am EVERY weekday to get a workout in, that we have been weight training consistently and I'm getting stronger, that my waist DID go down and that he's been noticing that lately in the way my clothes fit. It helps but I'm still feeling pretty discouraged..... in that foggy gray area between going all GI Jane or saying forget it and throwing in the towel. Thankfully I still have a piece of my rational brain in my head and I'm not going to go overboard on either spectrum. I have a plan:
#1 - PRAY. I've found that nothing stops the bad thoughts better than telling God what's going on. He already knows, but it's therapeutic for me to confess all the ways that I'm not loving myself very well in this moment. And I need to read what HE says about me. That I'm beloved, precious, fearfully & wonderfully made. (God help me believe that more when I feel like such a failure.)
#2 - Buy a food scale. My husband said we can go get one today. Because despite the "deck of cards" tip, I truly have no idea if I'm eating 4oz of chicken or 8oz. And when I'm hungry... well, I might be a BIT biased??
#2.5 - Be sure to MEASURE everything that goes in my mouth. Kind of goes hand-in-hand with the scale, but if I'm honest with myself and you, I've been more lax on actually getting out the Tablespoon or 1/4 cup measures.
#3 - Eat BETTER calories. More whole grains, more veggies, & less sugars.
#4 - KEEP GOING. My work outs have been good. They challenge me without causing injury and I've been very consistent. I just need to get the eating in check and keep truckin'.
I don't know if this is a plateau, if I'm doing the right things, if there are other reasons for the gain in weight and inches, or if I've been a slacker. Right this second I have about a million doubts. But I think if I make sure to be honest with myself and my SP trackers, I will see progress. I'm going to be grateful for the solid 10 pounds that I've lost and try not to berate myself for not being farther along.