Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Hi guys, well have to tell you first that my acceptance was right out the window this morning for about ten minutes. I lost it completely. Have not been so angry in a very long time.
Last Friday the property developer who is putting in the sub-division behind me said that my boundary fence was over limit by about 35 centimetres and asked if they could move my fence back on to my land. This had been confirmed by his engineer. I already knew so I agreed that they could move and replace it without encroaching on my garden. I wrote them a very specific letter regarding the trees and plants and also to not damage the above ground pipe that carries the mains water to my house. So far so good.
The fence they removed was supposed to be moved and replaced yesterday. It was removed yesterday and I assumed without mishap. Did not even think of going to check it out.
I woke up this morning and the fence had not been replaced and upon investigation the whole length, some 11 metres of fence had been thrown on my garden along with a whole load of broken concrete and the plants and foliage were buried underneath. The next thing I discovered was them digging up the gully to lay the new drain pipes right down the boundary from the cottage to the gate. The shrubs (and I am just hoping not the trees) were uprooted or damaged. I could not believe my eyes. I just lost it and screamed like a banshee at the workmen and then got the property developer on the phone ---- have to tell you my friends, the last thing that occurred to me was to be patient and accepting. O dear me NO! Ego was in full flight.
I came back into the house and felt dreadful on the inside - guess you may know the feeling if you have ever been out of control. I had been so far into my ego nothing else could get through. One of the team of workman even told me to stop yelling at the foreman. He was right beside me.... well embarrassing, humiliating and I was none too accepting then either. HUH!!!
Thankfully a little while later I came back to the peaceful state of non-resistance. I know that is the only way for me to live in peace. Acceptance of 'what is' and then deal with the situation in a calm and productive manner - behaving like a human being rather than a raving banshee, which always comes from the place of resistance to 'what is' .
The good thing to come out of this situation - that I am now feeling grateful for - is that I have learned yet again, hopefully at a deeper level, that no matter what happens there is only one path for me personally - no matter what! I cannot change 'what is' - I can only change how I choose to respond to it.
Just now the project manager arrived and I went out on site again and was able to apologise to the whole crew of workman for my rage. And the foreman and the project manager were both helpful and co-operative. It is not a question of who is right or wrong. So this time I went out in a place of peace and acceptance (by acceptance I do not mean letting people walk all over me). I mean being in the space where I want what is best for everyone not just me. The matter was resolved quite quickly. The foreman has put the posts back in and erected a mesh fence to keep people out and the fence will be replaced by the weekend. The project manager is getting his landscaper to come in and see me tomorrow and replace all the damaged gardens. So simple and we all parted agreeably and happy with the outcome.
Amen to living in the moment, in the deep space inside where there is only peace and freedom from ego.