Tuesday, October 15, 2013
I read something recently which helped me come to a very important distinction and revelation.
FOOD IS AN INANIMATE OBJECT. FOOD HAS NO POWER. FOOD CAN'T MAKE ME DO ANYTHING.
I accept responsibility for who and where I am. I accept responsibility for my decisions and actions. I know that to look at food in ANY OTHER WAY holds me back from healing my relationship with it, with myself and with my world.
I have been on this road of recovery for six months. I came here because I was out of control. Not food...not my weight...not my life...I...ME...STEPHANIE was OUT OF CONTROL. Fortunately, if I am the problem...I can be the solution.
In blaming food, I gave over my power to fix what was wrong. Food sits in my cupboard. Food sits on my plate. Food cannot DO anything!
I won't go into the bloody details, but I have changed since I came to SPARK. In changing...I learn how to accept and surrender. In changing...I discover Presence in each moment. In changing...I love this person. And it is that acceptance and surrender...that Presence...that LOVE...that makes me not abuse myself with food today! :-) Food only ever had the power I gave it when I made it the enemy and when I failed to love myself enough to say 'no' to ANY decision which does not serve my best interest.
I LIKED me when I got here...I'm not so sure I LOVED me when I got here. But today I do...I love me...enough to do what's best for me. And all this Halloween candy in the office can kiss my self-lovin' A$$!!!! ;-)~~~~~~ I've been walking by it for almost a week and I'm gonna keep walking by it today :-).
I am grateful today for six months of recovery on Spark! I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR THIS LIFE!!!