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Looking for the Inner Beauty - Tales from 100# Down

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Friday, October 11, 2013

emoticon I want to share something from my heart with you today. I've touched on it before in a blog but want to share more openly with you because maybe it will make a difference to at least one person.

I think most of you know that I began this journey somewhere over 350 pounds and I don't know where that somewhere was because my scales didn't go any further. I have NO pictures of me at that stage of my life because frankly I was very ill and my DH didn't take pictures because he was being kind so I just have to say 350+ as my starting weight. I do know that after I had been "dieting" for awhile we bought some new scales and by then I was down to 345 (still no pictures).

Here are a few of me around 320 in this blog:

www.sparkpeople.com/mypa
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Here is one I know was 316 because this was a few months into Sparkpeople (I had not yet found BLC - the 12 week member created challenge here on Sparkpeople).
www.sparkpeople.com/mypa
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I thought I was doing great by then but I see my calves were huge, my arms were huge and my belly took up my lap not to mention my many chins.

Now you may be wondering why I'm dredging up these old pictures. I'm doing so because I want to make a point. The person in those pictures and the person writing this to you right now are the SAME person. Oh sure, things have changed, what I eat, how I move, my self-confidence, but I'm still the same person that loves holidays, old movies, animals, flowers, birds, music, the smell a fire burning in autumn, the first snowflake, the first crocus of spring and a great college basketball game.

emoticon Why am I telling you this? Because society often doesn't give us a chance. They see only the exterior and they miss out on the "great people" that make up the "interior". I have been watching people for a long time. I worked for years in women's retreats where strangers from many towns would come together for a long weekend. That first meet and greet time at the beginning of the weekend I would see the same thing happen over and over. People do not choose the large person to sit by, talk to, be the "buddy" for the icebreaker exercise, etc.

Now I can't speak for everyone of size but I can tell you that I plastered a smile on my face and pretended like everything was OK but inside it hurt. I never want ANYONE to feel that kind of hurt... so here is my little challenge for you.

When you are out and about and a person of size is in line next to you or coming up that aisle in the grocery - give them a nice smile. You don't know what battles they may be facing in their health, home, relationships etc. You just don't know the "why" behind their obesity. It's not as simple as too many french fries. It might be anything from sexual abuse as a child, to domestic abuse by a partner, to financial ruins to tragic death in a family. Treat everyone like you wish to be treated. Look for INNER beauty!

Now lest you think I'm promoting "fat acceptance" I'm not. I'm promoting the INNER beauty of the person because when we value them then they can value themselves and that's the first step to making and FINISHING this journey to "Health & Fitness".

Hope you make someone's day today by just giving them a genuine smile or a kind word.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EFFRAYECHILDE 10/24/2013 9:27AM

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GRACILU 10/19/2013 6:08PM

    Awesome

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2BDYNAMIC 10/19/2013 11:47AM

    You and your story are simply amazing!!! ....... Great blogs to share and I for one DO listen!!! emoticon

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NVR2LATE2BFIT 10/16/2013 11:57PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MARYJEANSL 10/15/2013 11:30PM

  Well, they said it was, but I am always a bit leery when it comes to waterproof-ness. Thanks for the info.

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TAISIAKAT 10/15/2013 3:33AM

    Thank you for a very well written and important point. We are still the same person for the most part - whether we loose 10-100 to whatever. I know that for me, Society judges people too much, and makes it harder for us to stay strong.

Thank you again. emoticon

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WORLDSERIES11 10/14/2013 2:07PM

    that was beautiful!!! what a lovely idea!
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JEANNEBUM2 10/14/2013 11:54AM

  We all need to be reminded, from time to time, to be kind to others. Sometimes, a smile can make all the difference in the day of the person you are smiling at. And it makes you feel better, too! Thanks so much for this.

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JANTHEBLONDE 10/14/2013 9:46AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 10/14/2013 9:47:04 AM

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MARYJEANSL 10/13/2013 11:36PM

  I try not to judge anyone by how he/she looks, and I would hope I would be friendly to everyone, though I know if I were in a bad mood, I would probably be friendly to no one. :-( But you have motivated me to make a conscious effort, and I thank you for that.

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KKLENNERT809 10/13/2013 7:42PM

    A smile goes a long way!! Makes you feel good

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RENATA144 10/13/2013 7:05PM

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LIVELYGIRL2 10/13/2013 6:43PM

  Perhaps the beauty that was inside can also be reflected on the outside, when we feel better about ourselves. Sometimes poor posture, facial expressions, and baggy clothes, might mean how we feel, not always.

Yes, we should be kind to others no matter how they look.

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CUDDLYPOLARBEAR 10/13/2013 5:56PM

    well said

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DELLMEL 10/13/2013 4:00PM

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AJB121299 10/13/2013 3:56PM

    Nice

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RUNNINGYOGINIRE 10/13/2013 1:33PM

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DUSTYPRAIRIE 10/13/2013 1:18PM

    (((hugs))) What a great share!!

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BORISBOY 10/13/2013 1:16PM

  I understand this very well..I've seen life from heavy and thin...I'm still the same person, but people react to me differently depending on my size..I love your blog!!

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CAROLYNL8E 10/13/2013 11:41AM

    Well said!

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JCRAFT6 10/13/2013 8:40AM

    Thanks for sharing

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LOSTMOTIVATION 10/13/2013 4:44AM

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JACKIE15108 10/13/2013 4:40AM

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ANIHAKA 10/13/2013 4:18AM

    In a way the overweight suffer from bullying. It's awful I remember meeting a girl who hid behind her weight and was treated badly by others. All she was wanting was for people to accept her for herself but she went about it the wrong way. I hope she's alright and someone has been able to reach her & she's found love in the world.
Thank you for this blog.!

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CORNERKICK 10/13/2013 1:28AM

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BLUEJEAN99 10/13/2013 1:12AM

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SJKENT1 10/12/2013 11:50PM

    Thanks for the reminder. Kindness goes a long way.

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ROCKYCPA 10/12/2013 11:16PM

    emoticon

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JIBBIE49 10/12/2013 10:27PM

    Great to see your blog featured in the Spark Mail.

I can't imagine being 316# since when I joined Spark six years ago I was at my worst weight of 214# and thought that was horrible. But if I hadn't stayed here at Sparks these past six years, I'm sure by now I'd be at 316# as it is so easy to keep gaining.
Glad u have done SO well.

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CHARTHESTAR 10/12/2013 9:37PM

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GOOSIEMOON 10/12/2013 9:00PM

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DIANNEMT 10/12/2013 8:16PM

    You know--this really touched me today. thank you--I will do my best to remember to do this every chance I get.

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LISA_FRAME 10/12/2013 5:07PM

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KARRENLYNN 10/12/2013 5:03PM

    Unfortunately it's true, our looks are almost always the first filter we are judged by. And what 's also true is that appearances are almost always deceiving because we don't know the underlying circumstances.

Good advice you give and I accept the challenge.

Have a great day!

Karen

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NEWTINK 10/12/2013 4:20PM

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LCRUMLEY81 10/12/2013 4:07PM

  very well said thank you

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SHERYLP461 10/12/2013 4:00PM

    Kindness is always the way to live your life.

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JSEATTLE 10/12/2013 3:58PM

  Smile all the Way!

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SALLYLEE84 10/12/2013 3:23PM

    emoticon

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JOANNHUNT 10/12/2013 2:13PM

    AWESOME BLOG. THANK YOU FOR SHARING.

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PILGRIM125 10/12/2013 1:59PM

    emoticon So true!

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BABYSTEPS123 10/12/2013 1:48PM

    Beautiful! Thanks for the reminder!

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NONNAOF2 10/12/2013 1:19PM

  I'm sure that many have missed the opportunity in knowing some wonderful people, it's their loss! Inner beauty tops outer beauty any old day of the week! :-)

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111BUTTERFLY111 10/12/2013 1:00PM

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JUSGETTENBY42 10/12/2013 12:21PM

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PENOWOK 10/12/2013 12:15PM

    Excellent point!! Thanks for telling it like it is!

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MRSRIGS1 10/12/2013 12:07PM

    emoticon I've always said, 'Treat others as you which others to treat you'. I taught my kids not to judge others because of their looks, race, religion etc. I've always said judge the individual by how they treat you. I know what it's like to feel 'discriminated' or 'judged'. Thank you for posting this blog!

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MINIMOE1 10/12/2013 12:00PM

    So true, so true, so true!

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CICELY360 10/12/2013 11:53AM

  Good blog

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PATRICIAANN46 10/12/2013 11:43AM

  What a WONDERFUL blog........... emoticon emoticon

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