Monday, October 07, 2013
The current challenge I have set for myself is to nail down and finalize a goal weight during this year, 2013. I made my initial goal weight in March of 2009 at Weight Watchers. Fifty six free monthly weigh-ins after that achievement, I'm still playing around with what is the best weight for me that I can maintain. I laugh when I think that the WW program has 6 weeks built into it to accomplish this task, and here I am, 4.66 years later still working it.
Perhaps I need a remedial goal weight setting class, BUT here I am, 4.66 years later at a healthy BMI, living life healthier and happier than I ever thought I could. So I've struggled a bit to set the goal, and I've struggled to define and live the habits that support that goal. OK. Is it really any wonder after 5 decades of living life overweight or obese that establishing that lifestyle would take some work and some time?
Right now I am testing whether 126 is a maintainable weight for me. This morning it was 126.2, very close. But silly me, yesterday I didn't weigh because I felt bloated and didn't want to see what the scale said. Why am I afraid after all these years that I will get discouraged after one bad weigh? I had eaten a few bites more than my generous post-run calorie range, that was one reason. And two days before when I had stuck to my plan completely I weighed 127 the next day, which is probably the second reason -- I figured it was worse. If I want to do an accurate weight averaging I need to weigh each day. And if I want to weigh 126, I don't have to be perfect, but pretty near. And, yes, I know weight fluctuates. But I want to fluctuate below 126 as often as I fluctuate above.
So I accept that there is a certain silliness (insanity?) to this finalizing my weight. My husband hasn't noticed any weight change in me the last 4.66 years. Nobody else cares or notices. Yet I can see and feel the difference. So I don't know yet whether 126 will be my final goal weight. But it might. And my intention is to pursue sanity on this issue after I have accomplished this challenge!