Advertisement -- Learn more about ads on this site.

    LMULLINS4LIFE   51,349
50,000-59,999 SparkPoints

"NO", I will not say "No".

Monday, October 07, 2013

So, I am working through the article, "23 Things Every Woman Should Stop Doing" for the next few months. 013/09/11/23-things-every- woman-should-stop-doing_n_ 3908151.html

Last week, I was working on saying "no" to my children. It was a difficult week, but not as scary as I assumed it would be. Yes, my kids are used to getting what they want. And they weren't happy this week when they didn't get everything they asked for, but surprisingly...they got over it very quickly.

Here is a great story from this past week. An illustration of how saying "no" can be such a powerful tool in teaching true gratitude.

Mr. T was helping me out with my kids last week. And my littlest shares a room with me right now. Mr. T is lucky enough to be delegated to a mattress on the floor. Haha! 5 yr old has been BEGGGGING for chocolate milk for like 3 days. He drinks when he wakes in the middle of the night. (I know, I know...not the healthiest habit, but whatever.) We keep telling him "no" because we have other drinks in the house and I just didn't want to spend $4 on a gallon of chocolate milk or more on something like Nestle Quik. And I really don't like chocolate syrup in milk...especially when he's drinking it from a sippy cup at night.

However, at 4:00 in the morning Sunday, in an act of sheer kindness, in the middle of a massive thunderstorm, my amazing man got up from a deep sleep, got dressed and went to the gas station to buy my little man some chocolate milk. And that's not even the sweet part.

At 7:30am, a tiny voice next to me:

"Mommy, I'm thirsty."
I go to the kitchen and come back and hand him the cup.
"Yeah, buddy?"
"This is chocolate milk!!!"
*A few seconds of silence*

Awwww!!!! So sweet! I guarantee if we would have just bought it for him the moment he asked for it, he would not have been so thankful. What a cool byproduct of holding out and working to teach him patience.

This week is a slight twist on last week.

3. Saying ďnoĒ to yourself.

A lot of women spend a whole lot of time deciding what we canít do or shouldnít do or arenít good enough to do. Donít allow your insecurities and anxieties to make your decisions for you -- youíll only end up missing out on worthwhile experiences. So go talk to that group of people you think you wonít fit in with, stay out late against your better judgment every once in awhile and treat yourself to that blowout even if you donít really need it.

I was just talking to Mr. T about this! I blogged about a month ago about how I am going to start taking care of myself. Recently, I noticed I am literally to the dregs on all my make-up. Well, it just so happens there is a special on make-up with the company I work for and I could get a great deal. Still, I hate to spend money. Mr. T is encouraging me to order it. I keep resisting. I also realized I DESPERATELY need a haircut. I actually make the time and the room in my budget for a haircut maybe once a year. These are silly things. And, in some senses, they are the basics for me to be able to feel like a well put together, professional woman. I struggle with confidence...and these things could help me with that. I constantly resist buying things like this because I don't want to spend the money. But we aren't talking about Sephora make-up and a $75 haircut here. This is more in the ballpark of Great Clips, you know what I'm saying? I blow more money on a trip to Target every single week than I would on this stuff once a year.

I need to bite the bullet and do this for myself. I work hard and I've struggled to keep this family afloat for the past 9 months and, well, I am not ashamed to say I deserve it. I would never advocate complete carelessness with finances, but every once in awhile, you've just got to allow yourself a couple small things.

So, that's my assignment for this next week. Hold me to it.


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
SKJCHAPMAN 10/14/2013 11:31PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
GEORGE815 10/12/2013 1:24PM

    Its all in the face!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MEH50BEWELL 10/9/2013 8:53AM

    Mr T is so right! YOU deserve it --

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMAGINE46 10/8/2013 1:42PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
LSPIZZA 10/8/2013 7:46AM

    Great blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUNEAU2010 10/7/2013 10:50PM

    I love the way you ended this blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KIPPER15 10/7/2013 8:17PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
LINDAK25 10/7/2013 4:52PM

    Is this just something all women do or is it a "Mommy" thing? We deny ourselves because the kids need it more. We eat the un-pretty food. We take the color no one else wanted. And that's okay, but you're right. We have to do things that make us feel good about ourselves. If you consider how long that makeup is going to last, then price it out over time, it's not that expensive. do something for yourself and stop trying to justify the expense. The boost to your self-esteem is well worth it!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KALANTHA 10/7/2013 4:22PM

    I believe self-care is a critical component to our physical and emotional health. I say, "Good for YOU!"

Report Inappropriate Comment

    Thanks for posting! You're doing great!

Report Inappropriate Comment
APACHESTEVE 10/7/2013 2:11PM

    Buy the make up, get the hair cut, it will be worth far more in self esteem than the actual cost. Man or woman, sometimes we need to do things that make us feel good about ourselves. I'm also learning this concept that should be obvious.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CAROL_31649731 10/7/2013 1:09PM

    You're right . . . you DO deserve it! Good for you, realizing it. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GOING-STRONG 10/7/2013 12:44PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
PATTISTAMPS 10/7/2013 12:33PM

    And maybe next time you can REALLY splurge and have a pedicure! Yes, you do need to give yourself a treat now and then. I know you are having a tough time with the budget, but your hair and make-up will not make the difference in the long term. What will make the difference is the lift it will give you. I know that when I have a good haircut, I feel better about myself and about life in general.

Hoping that when you and Mr T combine households it will ease the financial strain a bit.

Report Inappropriate Comment
OBIESMOM2 10/7/2013 12:08PM

    1. taking care of YOU makes you happier, and is therefore better for everyone in your life

2. when your daughter is an adult, how would you feel if she neglected/denied herself some make-up or a haircut? Set an example - it's OKAY to do something every once in a while for YOU.


Report Inappropriate Comment
ARUNNINGKAT 10/7/2013 12:06PM

    You are on the right track! Taking care of yourself will go a long way in how you feel, function and live your life. It will be worth it for you and your kids!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DALID414 10/7/2013 12:00PM


Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

Log in to post a comment.

Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

Other Entries by LMULLINS4LIFE