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    ONEKIDSMOM   107,619
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Success story - what it is and what it isn't

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Monday, October 07, 2013

Many of us long for heroes and she-roes... people who are showing us that our dreams CAN be achieved. And we want our heroes to succeed.

At the same time, though, we want our heroes to be human, don't we? And that includes the occasional flaw, slip, or even back-slide.

I recently OK'd the sharing of my own success story, and it's out there for the Spark world to see. This is a two-edged sword. Because if you have a certain personality trait, it can energize your inner Polly Perfectionist!

Which means the next time you slip up, Polly won't want ANYBODY to know about it! She'll want to tell you that you have to keep up the APPEARANCE of success, that if you tell anybody you gained a few pounds, or that you're not at your goal yet? That makes you a FAILURE, not a SUCCESS, and why try?

Well, folks, after having read a couple of "confession" blogs by fellow Spark successes I happen to know, who have had considerable public attention recently... I'd like to share this perspective:

The fact that someone who has "succeeded" has a slip, a back-step, or a back-slide does NOT remove them from being a success, in my book. It makes them an even BETTER role model when they dust off their knees and continue the day to day battle. Even if they back away from Spark for a while to work on their issues, it doesn't mean that there is anything to be taken away from their success.

Success is the setting and achieving of a goal. It's an outcome. It's what happens when we don't give up. Each and every one of you here on Spark is a success in some way!

The thing such examples show us (and by the way, I'm one of them, you've seen my "confession" blogs along the way, too) is that this journey is NOT a one time shot and you're done. It's a rinse and repeat, learn something more with each successive experience. It's a process to learn to love yourself and reject the identity that Polly wants to put on you.

I don't know about you... but I want MY heroes and she-roes to be human. To have struggles same as me. To overcome those struggles... not perfectly, but repeatedly. ONE day at a time!

Because LIFE is good, each of us is worth living it to the best of our ability. Spark on! emoticon
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LORIVIOLA 3/31/2014 11:35AM

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TERRIJ7 2/26/2014 10:36AM

    I appreciate your thoughtful words.

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SCRIPTEDFLIGHT 2/3/2014 3:37PM

    emoticon emoticon

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NASFKAB 12/1/2013 4:52AM

  well written & very true thanks

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BEST_LIFE_NOW 11/2/2013 10:36AM

  Great blog!

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GRATEFUL_BEING 10/29/2013 7:21PM

    emoticon

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STARDUST_1970 10/29/2013 12:19PM

    I have never thought about what it is like once you hit your goal. This is kinda a wake up call. It's funny how the mind works sometimes. You have heard how some lose tons of pds and still see themselves heavy in the mirror; yet, when they started the journey they thought their life would be so different if they could just lose some weight. I am one of those thinkers. lol I have always thought that if i could just lose some weight and get healthy my life would be better. I never once thought that this journey would still be as tough as day one (yes, i am sure it gets easier to eat the right foods and keep it up). I never thought about how my emotional eating will most likely still be a problem.
I love reading blogs like yours..Gives me a lot to think/work on. With sparkers like you i am sure to find success. Thanks again for your blog.

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LAKEGIRL4 10/29/2013 12:04PM

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IMAGINE46 10/29/2013 9:30AM

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RUNNERRACHEL 10/28/2013 11:45PM

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MJ7DM33 10/28/2013 8:56PM

  Great blog!!! Thx for sharing!

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CELIAMINER 10/28/2013 9:38AM

    Thanks for voicing some of what I've been feeling lately. As I approach 1.5 years on maintenance, I'm struggling with motivation, and I've gained a few pounds. I catch myself before the damage gets too bad and get back on track for awhile, then get lazy again and stop tracking. One thing that I am learning (or relearning) is the need for change. I've been in a rut and like many others, I moaned when I saw yet again another huge change on SP with the new Start page. Once I stopped the negative talk and started exploring the change, though, I found a little of the motivation I've been missing.

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NANCY- 10/28/2013 7:33AM

    emoticon
Here's to being human.
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MJREIMERS 10/28/2013 7:21AM

    emoticon once again! I think one of the best parts of Spark is that we can be human and not judged for our backslides. In fact, it makes the success all the sweeter and the fact that we can share it with others is even better!

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IMLOCOLINDA 10/28/2013 4:07AM

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TEXASFILLY 10/27/2013 8:05PM

    Thank you for sharing your experience. Sharing makes us vulnerable and I admire you for having the guts to do so. Your words remind me that when I see my fat reflection that there's a strong, healthy woman inside who reached her goals before. *hugs* BB~ emoticon emoticon

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SEABREEZE64 10/27/2013 11:05AM

    Thanks for this....
My "first" life on Spark I hit my goal weight. I was on the motivational page and Spark members kept dropping by telling me how awesome I had done.

Well, I slipped and slid and tumbled and gained. Unfortunately I reacted as if I cannot be on the motivational page since, in my own opinion, I was doing so terrible.

I quit Spark and started anew. Sometimes I wish I would have stuck it out, but anonymity is sometimes safer emotionally.

congratulations to you for all you successes!!!! May you have MANY more!

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COCK-ROBIN 10/27/2013 9:43AM

    So true! And I am all too human.

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MOM23CUTIES357 10/27/2013 9:11AM

    Thank you for sharing.

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EFFRAYECHILDE 10/21/2013 8:50AM

    emoticon

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IMSMILEY88 10/16/2013 4:28PM

    As an SP 'motivator' who feels like my past successes no longer mattered & I 'failed' because I'm not where I once was... thank you! Thanks for reminding me that I did have a success story. And, I AM human. And my story can still be a motivator to others. And that I can still change my own story as it is still being written.

I love being on SP and seeing all the wonderful stories of success. The little stories, and the big ones. The lessons learned, and the lessons relearned. The progress made, and even the slip ups which motivate to get back there and do it again.

Thanks!

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FAVORITEAUNT84 10/14/2013 11:27AM

    Boy, if that isn't the truth, I don't know what is! emoticon

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DUXGRL1 10/13/2013 12:28PM

    This is so true. After almost 3 years, I really believe that the success is not just in being able to lose the weight, but to be able to keep picking yourself up and getting back on track after a bad time.

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MARUKI52 10/11/2013 11:47AM

    I wholeheartedly agree with this. I think true role models are those that show they are human and are not perfect.

I have felt a failure since I put back most of the weight I had lost but just recently I see the glimmer of the return of my motivation. It needs a lot of fanning but the glimmer is there and, since seeing it, I now know that I can get started again on reaching my goal. It is not the end of my attempt, it has just been a hiccup which I can leave behind and now move on.

emoticon

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MRSRIGS1 10/9/2013 3:15PM

    emoticon It is a 'one-day-at-a-time' and pick yourself up and dust yourself off at times kind of journey. The success comes in NEVER giving up! Thank you for sharing this with us.

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NEWTINK 10/9/2013 2:29PM

    emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 10/9/2013 9:24AM

    I so agree! And I have to laugh when you say "in my book" which is in your opinion b/c in a later blog, from what you said there I really thought you had written a book! Well, did it ever occur to you that you should? I love the way the hit on the truth and tell it.
More people should be that honest. It helped get you where you are now. And that's a big WOW!

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JIBBIE49 10/9/2013 5:12AM

    emoticon Great to see your blog featured in the Spark Mail.

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BLUEJEAN99 10/9/2013 1:59AM

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MARYJEANSL 10/8/2013 10:41PM

  You are so right - a slip-up does not a failure make. The only way to fail is to quit trying.

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JAMER123 10/8/2013 9:50PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
Glad you shared your story with us all!!

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CETANISTAWI 10/8/2013 9:19PM

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ROCKYCPA 10/8/2013 9:05PM

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ONLYTEMPORARY 10/8/2013 8:41PM

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LIVELYGIRL2 10/8/2013 8:17PM

  I do think the people here are pretty honest and transparent. emoticon

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PATRICIAANN46 10/8/2013 6:36PM

  So very emoticon emoticon

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DIANNEMT 10/8/2013 5:25PM

    You are SO right! I have declared that I am maintaining--since I was "stuck" at a weight close to goal. Then I went WAY up (well, 7 pounds but that FELT way up) and I had to FIGHT to get back down. And this will happen a lot, I think--but I still feel successful! 40 + pounds are GONE--but still trying to come back and I will always have to fight them!

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JSEATTLE 10/8/2013 4:48PM

  Right on, you really hit it. Find success in each day.

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JUSGETTENBY42 10/8/2013 4:37PM

    emoticon

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PENOWOK 10/8/2013 3:33PM

    I totally agree! As long as we have skin on, we are less than perfect, though striving to get there...

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LCRUMLEY81 10/8/2013 2:46PM

  great blog

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KARRENLYNN 10/8/2013 12:53PM

    Good points to remember, thanks for sharing!

Karen

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NEPTUNE1939 10/8/2013 11:35AM

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REGILIEH 10/8/2013 11:24AM

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JACKIE542 10/8/2013 11:22AM

    Love your blog, we have our ups and downs but we continue on!! emoticon

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JRRING 10/8/2013 11:20AM

  well said!

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LINDAK25 10/8/2013 11:04AM

    Yes! Oh, I am such a Polly. The thought of any kind of failure depresses me to paralyses. I have to remember that it's not an all or nothing gambit here. It's just life. Let it go and move on, right?

I've seen this happen to so many successful people. Here's to moving on to more successes. (You can have more than one!) Here's to never giving up, because we can't give up on ourselves.

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SHOAPIE 10/8/2013 11:01AM

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CICELY360 10/8/2013 10:58AM

  Good blog

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WORKNPROGRESS49 10/8/2013 10:36AM

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