Wednesday, October 02, 2013
I was reading the Abstinence book from Overeaters Anonymous, when the penny completely dropped. What I was reading wasn't even really about this, but it must have just clicked - a real gift from my HP.
I realised that I have spent my entire life anticipating reaching this mystical goal (mostly it involves being at my ideal weight, but like that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, even at my ideal weight I never seemed to have found this goal).
I realised that every day I live abstinent I am at the goal, I am living my goal, I have all I need right there and all I have to do is keep it and if I wobble I can jump right back to being at my goal, simply by being abstinent.
I always felt that I needed to get to this place (my goal weight mostly) that got further away every time I fell off the wagon. Now I can see that losing the weight is a nice side effect of living as a whole person, who trusts their HP and is not fighting themselves and beating themselves up all of the time.
I am so grateful for this wonderful lesson and the sense of peace I feel from it.