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Hilarious parenting tweets

Monday, September 30, 2013

I donít now why I even bother making my kid a bowl of cereal when I can just pour some milk directly on his pants. -Dad and Buried

Thereís a fine line between wanting your kids to stay with you forever and wanting to sell them to the next gypsy carnival. -Darling Golightly

Give them an inch and theyíll whine and cry and break you down until you say FINE ONE MORE EPISODE just to quiet the sad sad operetta. -Ann Imig

My 2 year old has decided that she wants to dress herself today so Iíll have to cancel all of my appointments. -Brian Hope

Really hoping to win an Emmy for the performance I just gave pretending to like the cartoon face my 3 year old daughter drew on an egg. -Shane Nickerson

was gonna write a blog: 20 ways i freaked out on my kidsí 1st day at daycare. but i was so busy freaking out i forgot to write anything down. -Theresa DíAngelo

I know my boys are getting older because I no longer find myself rocking the grocery store shopping cart back and forth like a crazy person. -ReasonsMySonIsCrying

You know your kid is too attached to technology when she asks the Roomba how it likes her dress. -Jessica Valenti

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
LINOVER 9/30/2013 10:00PM

    You made me smile today! emoticon

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COCK-ROBIN 9/30/2013 8:49AM


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MOIRA2 9/30/2013 5:41AM

    emoticon Been there too!

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TWEETYKC00 9/30/2013 4:31AM


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INCREDIBLYME 9/30/2013 3:00AM

    been there

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MESEATURTLE 9/30/2013 1:41AM


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IOWA51973 9/30/2013 1:00AM

    A few of these hit close to home....Netflix is both a miracle and a curse!

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DALID414 9/30/2013 12:59AM


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PAMNANGEL 9/30/2013 12:40AM


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DOVESEYES 9/30/2013 12:33AM

    Rocking the shopping cart with no child it ---that was me for a long time :)

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LATTELEE 9/30/2013 12:22AM


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