Friday, September 27, 2013
I joined a new spark team to help me with night eating. Last night was day 2 of my streak.
There is something about making a decision to do something and admitting that it is
A. Not easy and
B. I can't do it by myself.
C. Realizing that I have a flaw stopping me from changing this behaviour. That old saying that "nothing changes if nothing changes" is so true, So I have tried to find different things to do in the evenings. It is not just about the food but something that makes me want to eat during that time. I can wait until I figure that out... or just do different things hoping I won't want to reach for food doing them.
D. It's a learning curve. I don't expect perfection. In fact, I because I have diabetes I may find depending on what activities I do, I NEED to eat at night. I will have to deal with that. Check my blood sugars in mornings. And then of course I can PLAN to have acceptable night snack choices.
E. Pride. I have told a family member my problem. In addition to blogging about this, joining a team and writing out a plan (you would think that would be enough) I had to say it out loud. I have a big "shame" thing going on. I like to look like I have everything under control and that this behaviour of eating at night is absolutely OK. I realized that my family will believe whatever I tell them... so I have chosen the truth.
Argh. Sometimes I wish it was easier. Presto! Decide and it happens. I'm pretty impressed that I have decided to look at it at all. It is a comfort thing in the evenings. Give up control. Crash. It is just for today, this streak. I have to keep telling myself that. Not forever. See what happens.