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10 Ways Having a Toddler is Like Being in Prison

Saturday, September 21, 2013

As a parent, your schedule is often dictated by the needs of your child, especially when that child is young. With that in mind, many aspects of the parenting experience could be compared with prison – complete with a sadistic little warden who harbors a Napoleon complex.

You can’t do anything without constant supervision

Every morning begins with someone screaming at you to wake up

You’re always terrified something bad will happen when you’re in the shower

You’re always terrified someone is going to crawl into your bed in the middle of the night

Meal time is fraught with tension

Someone’s always watching you go to the bathroom

You never get to choose the movie and then it’s hard to hear it over all the hooting and hollering

You’re always terrified someone is going to punch, bite, tackle, stab or attack you with some kind of makeshift weapon

Contraband — like booze, chocolate and adult entertainment — must be smuggled in and consumed in secret

Conjugal visits are hard to come by, require intense scheduling, and are often interrupted

BONUS: One Way Having a Toddler is NOT Like Being in Prison

Being placed in solitary confinement is a reward, not a punishment!

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
NAYPOOIE 9/25/2013 11:37AM


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GLC2009 9/23/2013 1:14AM

    well, perhaps that why i didn't have children emoticon i would greatly fear going to jail.

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MISSDAISY23 9/22/2013 2:50PM


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SHIRLEY721 9/22/2013 2:16PM

    .on.I remember well

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DESERTDREAMERS 9/21/2013 10:37AM

    Too funny (& true)!

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PDSLIM 9/21/2013 10:33AM


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DALID414 9/21/2013 10:21AM


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KNYAGENYA 9/21/2013 9:57AM

    emoticon Reason 406 why I am glad that I do not have children.

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NASFKAB 9/21/2013 9:41AM

  thanks my baby will be 38 in November

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LAURANCE 9/21/2013 7:41AM

  It's been a long, long time (like 49 years) since I had one of those little things. Thanks for the memories!
emoticon emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 9/21/2013 7:17AM

    Haven't seen that one before. Very funny!

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DOVESEYES 9/21/2013 7:12AM


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VICKI2705 9/21/2013 4:55AM

    emoticon very funny!

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EVER-HOPEFUL 9/21/2013 4:04AM

    never seen it like that before,lol. emoticon

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INCREDIBLYME 9/21/2013 3:19AM

    l know a few young moms who will appreciate this wisdom emoticon

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GENRE009 9/21/2013 1:59AM

    Sounds like you need a break! Bring in the troups! Like your mother or his , or really check for a good baby sitter a few times a month. You've heard the saying that if you can't give to yourself, then you're no good for someone else! Or something like that.

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