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SKINNYINMYHEAD
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Funks Happen... what chu gonna do about it?

Thursday, September 19, 2013

I am in a funk. Full funk. Feeling Funky.

Back in May I went to a "Chi Running" workshop, which is supposed to teach you how to run to reduce the risk of injury.. and in true irony - I injured myself during the workshop. Yeah, you read that right.. we had warmed up and then the instructor ""instructed us for about an hour while we stood around.. and got cold... then we were to use the technique to run 30 yards or so.. I had run about 10 yards when I knew something had happened to my achilles.. OUCH

I went to my doctor and she felt like it was achilles tendonitis and I went to 8 weeks of physical therapy.. it didn't really get better.. and I decided I'd go to an Orthopod when I returned from Africa.. which I did but Ii'd been limping around for almost 3 months.. got an MRI and found out I have a small tear in my achilles and achilles tendonOSIS (not itis).. and yesterday I got THE BOOT.. I have to wear it for six weeks.. and I have to do PT (physical therapy) again.. and if at the end of six weeks it's not better?? then surgery.. ugh

On top of that, about two months ago I "found" a tennis ball size lump in my left quad.. how? you ask? I was doing "wall sits" trying desperately to get to 3 minutes and at about 2 minutes and 20 seconds my legs started shaking and I reached down to rub them and felt "it".. the tennis ball.. it's weird.. it disappears if I relax my leg and reappears when I contract my quad. It has never hurt.. and still doesn't.. it's just there. So, while at the orthopod I had him look at it.

The orthopod thinks at sometime I've "ruptured" a portion of my quad EXCEPT that I should remember it because it should have hurt like the dickens, so much so that I would have high tailed it to the emergency department, he'd have been called and I would have had surgery to fix it... sigh, really???. The problem is I cannot think of a time when I have hurt my leg - ever - and most especially in the last six months.. He suggested that it might have happened a long long time ago and because of my weight loss and weight lifting it's made itself evident. hmmmmmm.. okay..

I say "well, I'm just glad it's not a tumor"...
"OH" he says "it could be a tumor especially since you can't remember ever hurting it"

Really?? SERIOUSLY?? UGH

He suggested either 1) monitoring for another 3 months for changes in size, etc. or 2) having an MRI... I've already met my deductible this year so I went for the MRI option so I can know for sure.. with my family's history of cancer, I just can't be too careful.. right?

So.. that is why I'm in a funk... the tests.. the boot.. the tennis ball.. ugh.. it happens.. Life can't be all puppies and rainbows.. but here's the deal.. I have not deviated from my eating plan during this funk.. I have continued my CrossFit workouts (even with the dern boot).. and I'm continuing to lose weight (albeit slowly).. however, I am NOT sleeping well at all which I know impacts my weight loss.

The silver lining is that I am not turning to food to deal with my funk... and that is HUGE.. it's also one of the fabulous side effects of the Paleo way of eating.. if I was eating like I used to, the cravings would be crazy and I would be diving headfirst into a jar of nutella, a bag of oreos and 3 pringle tubes!

One more thing... when I walked in CrossFit with my new fancy boot, my coach didn't miss a beat.. he asked about my limitations.. and then we "adapted" and kicked some serious po-po... I love that man.. so I can keep up my CrossFit workouts cuz where there is a will there is a way.. and I am ecstatic about that..

So, I'm here.. not at my best.. not a lot of energy to spare for others right now... so I will admit to "retreating" for a bit.. thank you for understanding..

104 days and 36lbs til ONEderland,
Annie
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • v ZEECHA
    I hear ya.
    When I hurt my right foot in June of 2010 (ruptured ligament), it took a very, very long time to heal. Staying off your feet is apparently very beneficial, but really? who can stay off their feet all the time? especially when you're active.

    Good for you for going to exercise anyway. That'll definitely help left your funk. and I would presume your coach would not have you do something that would injure you further, so having him help you will be a tremendous benefit for you (something I didn't have).

    and yeah, not turning to food for comfort IS HUGE! A+++!

    As for your tests. well. A+ for taking care of yourself. And you have health insurance --which is huge! I don't, and when I go for anything it's very costly. So good for you for going & getting things attended to!

    Hang in there. You're achieving your goals. You are determined and you are doing it!
    1012 days ago
  • v JECKIE
    Annie, I am so proud of you for working through these setbacks with your typical go-gettem attitude. You inspire me so much!

    I can't wait to tell you about my new stuff at the gym! :) Workout #3 this morning (since Tuesday) and while I am head to toe sore I'm loving it!

    Anyway, when are you coming east? I wanna see you! :)
    1013 days ago
  • v CHATERJOY
    So sorry you are having all these challenges. You are meeting them head on and dealing directly with the issues and Not eating.., sooooo emoticon emoticon
    1014 days ago
  • v RENEWNAN
    Keeping you in my prayers. When's the MRI?
    1014 days ago
  • v ANNMACP0212
    I am quite certain that if I was dealing with everything that you are, I would not have such a fantastic attitude. Best wishes for a speedy recovery...
    1014 days ago
  • v MAMACHAMBS
    Annie ~ you are such an inspiration. Let us help you get through this trial. Not that you need us! You are my hero!
    1014 days ago
  • v JUNEAU2010
    You are amazing! I applaud your attitude in the face of pain and serious concerns. I am humbled. I have been eating like a crazy woman in the face of the same thing. Not healthy!
    1014 days ago
  • v GETSTRONGRRR
    Bummer girl...either one of those would be frustrating, but both together...sheesh!

    But good on you for net giving up, and double kudos for showing up at Crossfit!

    Honor the pain....know the difference between good pain & bad pain, push the former, stop on the latter.
    1014 days ago
  • v WOUBBIE
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    Good grief.

    You are some flavor of awesome, woman. "...when I walked into CrossFit with my new fancy boot..." Sheesh.

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    This is your new, personal SparkPeople emoticon. It represents "She Who Conquers All Obstacles." You're my heroine!
    1014 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/20/2013 7:19:56 PM
  • v LETHA_
    Hang in there. Your luck will turn around.
    emoticon
    1014 days ago
  • v FUNLOVEN
    Oh, Annie, I am sooo sorry to hear about your Achilles.

    On a positive note, you are emoticon Sticking to your healthy eating plan and fitness training. Way to go girl! I am feeling positive that the MRI will be benign.

    I know you are feeling like you are in a funk right now and you might be thinking you don't have a darn thing positive to say, but sometimes keeping the blogs going is just what we need to pull us out of it. Just saying!

    We are always here for you emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1015 days ago
  • v AELI2468
    So sorry you are having a rough time mentally, but WOW, amazing that you are staying on track with fitness and food. That is the progress you need to remember as well!
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    1015 days ago
  • v STEPH-KNEE
    I heart that you said puppies and rainbows, and I just heart you so much! emoticon I totally understand your funk but you are seriously amazing, Cross fit even with the boot? They can knock you down but never count you truly out! My first thought was "it must be killing her not to be able to exercise" because you are such a beast in the gym, but I should have known better that this would not ruin you! I am SO incredibly proud of you for continuing to lose weight and not turning to food! I also respect you taking more time for yourself during this time and we are all here for you and love you and will be here for you whenever you pop in! emoticon
    1015 days ago
  • v TRIXIETEXAS
    You are wonderful and amazing, and even in your funk you are an inspiration.

    You are taking care of yourself, and that's the most important thing. It is so great that your positive changes are just part of your life now...no need to stop being healthy, being fit, just because times are tough.

    Please know that I am sending you big virtual hugs from Tulsa.

    Christina
    1015 days ago
  • v MARMAERT
    please let all of your "fans" know what the results are, ok? that you've been so cheerful and upbeat with all this hanging over you is unbelievable! emoticon
    1015 days ago
  • v COLUMBINE2
    Sad to hear this. Glad you got the tests & saw the dr. & are not "pushing through the pain", etc. Your body is the greatest gift you'll ever receive; replacement parts are never as good as the original parts ---so treasure them!

    I am totally impressed that you have truly conquered using food as a "comforter" when the going gets tough---wish I could achieve that level of maturity. I think it's just amazing!!!

    Get well soon, stay positive and firm in your resolve to be the healthiest Annie you've ever known!
    1015 days ago
  • v SUGAR0814
    When it rains it pours is an understatement in reference to your situation. It has stormed! But you are pulling through it like a champ! emoticon
    1015 days ago
  • v IMISSOATIE
    I'm sorry you're in a funk and that you are having all of these physical issues right now. I get into a funk, too, when something goes wrong with my body. It makes me feel like I'm never going to get healthy. But, look at all of the things you are doing. You will get there, you just have to be a little patient with yourself.

    You are missed in out chatrooms...so get on over there as soon as you can.

    emoticon
    1015 days ago
  • v KERRIELYNN719
    Talk about a string of bad luck....but that whole hurting yourself while learning how not to hurt yourself is totally right up my alley. I'm sorry. Hope nothing is wrong with you in terms of the tenis ball...

    Best of luck....and a quick and painless recovery
    1015 days ago
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