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Need some advice

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Okay, two good days so I return to Sparking a bit more frequently as long as things remain this way.
Even with ALL the stress I stayed on plan & was down to my lowest 192 last week. Since he started improving it's like my bingeing has returned! The better he's doing the more I'm shoveling in my mouth ! At first I didn't worry too much because I had dealt with A LOT of stress , but now it's like I'm back to being out of control with binges again. I've done it for several days now & I'm not seeming to snap myself out of it. I think I'm trying to comfort myself.(it's a reflective guess)

Maybe now that things have started to improve I felt such joy & happiness & MUCH less stress. Feelings I haven't been used to feeling for a long time. I think I'm having anxiety that this may change & his mental illness may resurface. I want SO much for him to be well. I noticed depression the last couple of days, even though I am SO thankful. Confusing.

How do I combat this. I'm eating A LOT ! Not good, don't want to negate all my hard work !
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    love Trish's advice seems to me that someone has told her "You start with one positive decision at a time. Don't try to be perfect." Dont know were I heard that before but is gread advice emoticon emoticon at a time
    1631 days ago
    I think it's normal to have " down" time after a period of intense stress.
    So is bingeing , unfortunately.

    Just go back to basics :one meal at a time,one moment at a time, and be gentle with yourself.
    This is ,after all,your coping mechanism, and you had intense stress!

    Praying for you! emoticon
    1635 days ago
    I am so happy that DS has had 2 good days in a row! Praise the Lord!!!!

    As for the advice, I don't know this from personal experience, but I can tell you what I read in the book that I just finished. It said that when you first get hungry, or get a craving for something, quickly drink a huge glass of water. In essence "binge" on water. It will fill your stomach making it very uncomfortable to overeat. Then, do some little strength exercises, like squats or arm circles for a couple of minutes. If you still feel the urge, go brush your teeth. Most of us don't like to eat after we brush our teeth. The main point of this is to get through the initial urgent moment of "needing" to eat something and to regain control.

    Hope this helps! Love you girl!!!
    1639 days ago
    I've noticed similar patterns in myself of late, so I'm not going to offer advice...unless you'd like to know what doesn't seem to work. :)

    I think the tendency to "let go" after a difficult period, even to return to old habits, is a perfectly understandable act. I guess our challenge is to find a way to change that pattern. Since I don't want to tell you what YOU should do, I'll share what I think I need to do in the same situation. I respond well to structure, and can usually count on myself to "arrange" it, but I haven't been doing that, so am considering structure from outside. (Usually I fight hard against that...) The SparkSolution book offers two weeks of structure - food, activity, reflection, etc - and perhaps that will help re-cement those new/better/healthier habits that got pushed into the background of late.

    I know you'll figure it out because you're intelligent, strong, and motivated. We're trying to change old patterns that were in place for years, trying to discard "old tapes" that play in our heads, and move in uncomfortable directions. The truth is that it may take longer, and require more readjusting, than either of us would prefer. But we can still do it.
    emoticon Gail
    1640 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/19/2013 10:42:11 AM
    At the times you're tempted to binge, get on Spark, go for a walk, call a friend, go exercise, eat some carrots or drink a cup of tea. Anything to take your mind off wanting to binge. You might have to try a few things to see what works for you. I've never been much of a binger, so I don't have a lot of experience with that, but I do get the munchies & the above things I've listed work for me. emoticon emoticon
    1640 days ago
    What you are doing makes a LOT of sense to me! If I was you, I would have a subconscious fear of my son returning to his destructive behavior, since it has happened before. Deep inside you know that ultimately he will need med adjustments since the human body doesn't function in a linear way. Thus, now that things are peaceful, your overeating is your way of blocking out the growing anxiety that the peace won't last. You are doing what I do when I am stressed - emotional eating.

    I would recommend making plans on what to do for yourself, just for YOU, something special - a hobby, time with friends, etc. - no matter what your son does (or doesn't do) so that his behaviour won't affect your mental health and peace of mind. In other words, that there is a something else steady in your life (e.g., hobby; friends, etc.) with the spiritual part of your life that will be the same no matter what your son does or doesn't do.

    For me it is reading fiction, taking long walks when the weather is nice, watching comedy shows on Netflix online, talking to friends on the phone or online, among other things I enjoy to do. Have a list of things you have wanted to do and incorporate some of those now so that when he needs med adjustments again, you have that ready to go.

    God bless you, Autumn. If you want or need to talk about his further, email me or visit my page, and I will do my best for you. emoticon
    Love, Chelsea emoticon
    1640 days ago
    You start with one positive decision at a time. Don't try to be perfect. Just make a good choice and then another good choice. Try delaying your eating for 15 mins while you do something else, then drink a glass of water, then eat...but think about what you are going to eat and if it is something your body needs or something you just want.

    Blogging, meditating, praying, reading, anything that takes your mind off comfort food may be good ways to battle this. One step at a time....
    1640 days ago
  • MRSP90X
    Without a doubt the only un-wordly answer is in the book: Made to Crave: Satisfying Your Deepest Desire with God, Not Food by Lysa TerKeurst. I am reading it now and it is a BIG BIG help!! It really opened my eyes to some things about craving and turning to food and the only solution to the problem that honors God. If I could send you a kindle copy from Amazon I would!!! In fact, if you email me your address I will buy you a copy and have it sent to your door, it is that good and important!!
    1640 days ago
    First of all I am grateful for the two good days. I know that I will think I deserve this food. I was good when things were going so bad, so now while things are good, I am going to go flipping crazy. At least you know that you are doing this, so that is a start. I feel like I am the last person to give advice on this subject, but I will offer what I can.
    Remember we are on a journey. It is OK to step off the trail every now and then whether to explore good things, or to get ourselves in trouble. Just remember the path you have been on and the great milestones you have passed. You have learned a lot on this journey. Get back on the trail. Maybe start back a few feet and relearn some things but don't forget why you started this trek in the first place.
    1640 days ago
  • MSHEL7
    First and foremost, you realize what is going on. That is a wonderful start. Maybe you are having a party in your mouth since things are going well for the moment. I tend to do that. Things get good and I eat, I reward myself for things going well. As far as how to get passed it, I am not sure, just workout through the times when you feel yourself struggling, or blog. You could also do something totally out of the norm like brush your teeth, no one likes to eat let alone binge after brushing. Sometimes I clean when I feel a binge coming on. Anything to get your mind onto something else and get you away from the binges. Keep us posted on how you do, and if you get any really good advice, pass it on, we all need help in this area, at least most of us do. Have a nice peaceful night. emoticon
    1640 days ago
  • ALICEART2010
    Try to find healthy ways to use your time instead of eating. I know it's hard to do....
    reading, writing, going to SparkPeople, prayer, etc.
    1640 days ago
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